As a nearly life long northern NJ resident who spent 4 years in CT and a few years / family in NY, I think you nailed it. I still say NY pizza is vastly overrated. I've had plenty of mediocre slices in gross places. My favorite is Rays. The one I go to is the Original... or is it Famous... or is it Original Famous... whatever.
I (possibly embarrassingly) like a couple chains, including Anthony's Coal Fire out of Florida of all freakin' places. Really good in my opinion. Don't know if they are in CT. I only go to Blaze in Paramus, NJ to get UConn recruiting information. There are also some thin crust places by me (Bergen NJ) that are awesome, but you can easily throw down a whole pie (Kinchley's Tavern, Nelly's).
I think New Haven has some fantastic pizza that goes over an above, but it also has some garbage. In NJ, I feel confident that if I walk into a local pizza joint, it will be good even though it may not be great. I have 3 local places in my 2.5 square mile town. They are all solid, but not spectacular. So NJ's median is better than CT in my opinion, but I'd put the great New Haven places at the top.