Worst movies ever | Page 3 | The Boneyard

Worst movies ever

The remake of the John Ford classic "The Hurricane". The remake stared Timothy Bottoms and Mia Farrow, it gets my vote as number 1. Shot on location in the South Pacific, great director, and a great cast so you would think, right? Wrong!!! One of the truly great motion picture disasters of all time.
 
Have none of you, children??

I had to take my two boys to see a Pokemon movie (not sure which one - yea it was that bad). However a year or so later I ended up taking my daughter to see one of the Rugrat movies (again, no idea which one) and it was even worse.

I would have rather watched the eclipse without special glasses. My eyes would have probably felt better.
 
meyers7 said:
Have none of you, children??

I had to take my two boys to see a Pokemon movie (not sure which one - yea it was that bad). However a year or so later I ended up taking my daughter to see one of the Rugrat movies (again, no idea which one) and it was even worse.

I would have rather watched the eclipse without special glasses. My eyes would have probably felt better.
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I look at movies like that as prime nap time - a little air conditioned slumber.
 
John said:
I look at movies like that as prime nap time - a little air conditioned slumber.
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I actually did fall asleep with my daughter. Wouldn't dare do that with the boys...they'd be gone. :rolleyes:
 
Haven't read through the thread, but I am confident that I have the winner:

 
.-.
meyers7 said:
Have none of you, children??

I had to take my two boys to see a Pokemon movie (not sure which one - yea it was that bad). However a year or so later I ended up taking my daughter to see one of the Rugrat movies (again, no idea which one) and it was even worse.

I would have rather watched the eclipse without special glasses. My eyes would have probably felt better.
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I saw a Rugrats movie with my son. It was physically painful.

Then again I remember my dad taking me to see "Bullwhip Griffin" so I figure it was payback.
 
meyers7 said:
Have none of you, children??

I had to take my two boys to see a Pokemon movie (not sure which one - yea it was that bad). However a year or so later I ended up taking my daughter to see one of the Rugrat movies (again, no idea which one) and it was even worse.

I would have rather watched the eclipse without special glasses. My eyes would have probably felt better.
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I took my daughter and nephew to see The Emoji Movie.

I win.
 
.-.
nelsonmuntz said:
I am willing to give bad movies that made no pretensions about being good a pass. The ones that I hate are the ones that take themselves seriously and still suck. The Master is one of those.
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I went into The Master with high hopes and was utterly disappointed. On second viewing, I found it absolutely hilarious. The comedy was unintentional but did not detract from my experience.
 
huskyrob1 said:
The remake of the John Ford classic "The Hurricane". The remake stared Timothy Bottoms and Mia Farrow, it gets my vote as number 1. Shot on location in the South Pacific, great director, and a great cast so you would think, right? Wrong!!! One of the truly great motion picture disasters of all time.
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I just watched The Hurricane and thought it was pretty good. But I've always like Denzel so I am biased. :cool:
 
While I didn't choose it, wife did, The Family Stone was one of the worse movies I ever saw. It has a pretty well known cast / Dian we Keaton, Rachael McAdams, Etc. & while I thought it wouldn't be great, it'd at least be watchable, maybe mildly amusing. Instead it was loathsome from start to finish / I mean it was unpleasant throughout getting worse & worse with every scene.
 
Taco said:
While I didn't choose it, wife did, The Family Stone was one of the worse movies I ever saw. It has a pretty well known cast / Dian we Keaton, Rachael McAdams, Etc. & while I thought it wouldn't be great, it'd at least be watchable, maybe mildly amusing. Instead it was loathsome from start to finish / I mean it was unpleasant throughout getting worse & worse with every scene.
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That is a great call. That movie was so bad it made me angry.
 
.-.
Husky25 said:
The Postman.
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Nah. I've watched it a handful of times. It's certainly flawed, but...
1) the first third of the movie is actually pretty good.
2) Olivia Williams boobage.
3) Tom Petty as the Mayor of the Dam.
4) Will Patton's villain role was well executed.

Biggest problem with The Postman was editing. Easily an hour too long.
 
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

That movie was so bad I was angry at the end of it.
 
nelsonmuntz said:
How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days

That movie was so bad I was angry at the end of it.
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Horrific. Good call.

My wife and I saw a doozy last night.

The kid had a friend sleepover, so I lost my den for the night. Wife wanted to watch a movie and there was absolutely nothing appealing so we opted for Apple's 99-cent movie of the week, The Shack.

I realize now that it is a Christian movie - that is not my thing, but no judgements there.

The movie was horribly written, brutally directed, acting was abysmal and the editing horrendous.

Sam Worthington forgot to hide his accent for short stretches of the movie.

At one point, his family is on the phone and they are talking about driving home to him in a snowstorm and he tells them not to because he "has never seen it this bad out." And then he goes outside and there is about 2" of snow on the ground after the storm. All right.

Later, in the snowy woods, he runs into an easy going guy of Middle-Eastern descent carrying some firewood who turns out to be Jesus. Jesus tells him, hey, come with me, we have a fire going...

So he follows Jesus and when they get to the shack, the shack isn't in the snowy woods...it is miraculously and intentionally in the middle of a lush, green summer forest. And there is no fire going because it's summer there...so why was Jesus gathering firewood? Because the movie is stupid.

For the record, Jesus was Middle Eastern. God was an African-American woman for a while until she became a Native American man. There is also a young Asian woman with them in the shack, but I couldn't tell if she was Mary or if she just checked another minority box.

Honestly, I need some of you to go see it so we can talk about it. There is a scene where Sam Worthington races Jesus across a lake that really should end Worthington's career.
 
Fishy said:
Horrific. Good call.

My wife and I saw a doozy last night.

The kid had a friend sleepover, so I lost my den for the night. Wife wanted to watch a movie and there was absolutely nothing appealing so we opted for Apple's 99-cent movie of the week, The Shack.

I realize now that it is a Christian movie - that is not my thing, but no judgements there.

The movie was horribly written, brutally directed, acting was abysmal and the editing horrendous.

Sam Worthington forgot to hide his accent for short stretches of the movie.

At one point, his family is on the phone and they are talking about driving home to him in a snowstorm and he tells them not to because he "has never seen it this bad out." And then he goes outside and there is about 2" of snow on the ground after the storm. All right.

Later, in the snowy woods, he runs into an easy going guy of Middle-Eastern descent carrying some firewood who turns out to be Jesus. Jesus tells him, hey, come with me, we have a fire going...

So he follows Jesus and when they get to the shack, the shack isn't in the snowy woods...it is miraculously and intentionally in the middle of a lush, green summer forest. And there is no fire going because it's summer there...so why was Jesus gathering firewood? Because the movie is stupid.

For the record, Jesus was Middle Eastern. God was an African-American woman for a while until she became a Native American man. There is also a young Asian woman with them in the shack, but I couldn't tell if she was Mary or if she just checked another minority box.

Honestly, I need some of you to go see it so we can talk about it. There is a scene where Sam Worthington races Jesus across a lake that really should end Worthington's career.
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Agreed the movie was poorly written and the acting wasn't that great, but it did do very very well at the box office. Critics panned it, and Christian theologians attacked it for portraying God the father, the son, and the Holy Spirit as three different people Worthington meets. What I want to know is what happened to the Ghost of Christmas past?
 
Got a nominee. Not that I was expecting much, but it was worse than I imagined--Baywatch. Tone deaf, couldn't quite decide what it was trying to be. Comedy? Serious action film? Odd couple/buddy cop flick? It had consistently foul language for no apparent reason and also had some lingering full frontal male nudity for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Definitely tons of objectification, but it was equal opportunity, so I guess that makes it okay. Would not be approved by the PC police.
 
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Any remake of a 1980's cult classic. Looking, not in the general direction, but right at Point Break, Total Recall, and Red Dawn.

Red Dawn was particularly cringeworthy. Couldn't last more than 20 minutes.

Not entirely unrelated, there is/are a (few) reason(s) Road House 2 gets almost no airtime or mention in any of these threads.
 
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