What I Learned on the Boneyard Today

[jleves]

Herbst leaving next year - people have wildly different opinions on the achievements of her term and what it means long term.

CV coming back this year - people have wildly different expectations on his impact, playing time and motives.

Gilbert is ready to go this year - people have wildly different expectations on his ability to contribute and success of his surgery.

People still care about old rock and roll singers and the royal wedding.

I love me some Boneyard.

 

[Scot-e]

DOOMED!

 

[storrsroars]

DOOMED!

Probably not. Pizza wasn't mentioned.

 

[B1GEast]

I prefer reading the obscure OT Medical conditions that people's "friends" have and the absurd advice they receive from Boneyarders.

That and legal advice.

 

[polycom]

What's the Boneyard?

 

[Kenny11]

This place is the best: Pizza, Arby's, beer, brain health, decoding recruits' twitter accounts, immigration attorney advice, gin, epic meltdowns, contract experts, bachelor parties, HVAC, Taylor Rooks...

 

[boba]

Herbst leaving next year - people have wildly different opinions on the achievements of her term and what it means long term.

CV coming back this year - people have wildly different expectations on his impact, playing time and motives.

Gilbert is ready to go this year - people have wildly different expectations on his ability to contribute and success of his surgery.

People still care about old rock and roll singers and the royal wedding.

I love me some Boneyard.

But the lesson was civics! And you slept through all of it!
(And those who care about the Windsor Hillbillies, well, are you sure they weren't just visitors from WV?)

 

[MadDogRevival]

That and legal advice.

I'm not going to comment on the medical advice, but the legal advice I've seen given here by the lawyers - and I'll exclude my own from this analysis - has been very good.

 

[Fishy]

I come here for the travel advice.

“I’d like to take a beach vacation somewhere in New England. Where should I go?”

“Tahoe!”

“I went to Peru in 1989...”

“Why would you go to a beach?”

 

[August_West]

I come here for the travel advice.

“I’d like to take a beach vacation somewhere in New England. Where should I go?”

“Tahoe!”

“I went to Peru in 1989...”

“Why would you go to a beach?”

and then dont forget storrsroars "I went to beaches before you guys even knew what beaches were"

 

[Fishy]

and then dont forget storrsroars "I went to beaches before you guys even knew what beaches were"

“I was still a fish when I crawled out of the sea onto the beach for first time.”

 

[ctchamps]

and then dont forget storrsroars "I went to beaches before you guys even knew what beaches were"

That make us sons of beaches?

 

[storrsroars]

and then dont forget storrsroars "I went to beaches before you guys even knew what beaches were"

I actually don't like beach vacations. I enjoy snorkeling on occasion but never saw the point in laying in sand and inviting skin cancer.

And you need to stop overworking a joke theme so hard. Let is rest for a couple of days, bring it back out on the weekend. Jokes get tired too, y'know.

 

[CL82]

I prefer reading the obscure OT Medical conditions that people's "friends" have and the absurd advice they receive from Boneyarders.

That and legal advice.

But it is the definitive authority for Connecticut pizza and razor blade use, so there's that.

 

[August_West]

I actually don't like beach vacations. I enjoy snorkeling on occasion but never saw the point in laying in sand and inviting skin cancer.

And you need to stop overworking a joke theme so hard. Let is rest for a couple of days, bring it back out on the weekend. Jokes get tired too, y'know.

I know I know. You told hipster jokes before we did.

 

[CL82]

This place is the best: Pizza, Arby's, beer, brain health, decoding recruits' twitter accounts, immigration attorney advice, gin, epic meltdowns, contract experts, bachelor parties, HVAC, Taylor Rooks...

Possibly the best synopsis of the BY I've ever seen.

 

[storrsroars]

I know I know. You told hipster jokes before we did.

Take away fast food from an aging hippie for a few weeks and boy they turn into nasty old men right quick.

But since it's obviously my disdain for jam bands/Dylan and whatever you deem as the "proper rock classics" I'm supposed to be enjoying that has gotten under your skin, let me ask you this:

Why did the Grateful Dead have two drummers?
In case one of them fell asleep.

 

[uchusky32]

I come here for the travel advice.

“I’d like to take a beach vacation somewhere in New England. Where should I go?”

“Tahoe!”

“I went to Peru in 1989...”

“Why would you go to a beach?”

Get the highest level of sunblock.

 

[August_West]

Take away fast food from an aging hippie for a few weeks and boy they turn into nasty old men right quick.

But since it's obviously my disdain for jam bands/Dylan and whatever you deem as the "proper rock classics" I'm supposed to be enjoying that has gotten under your skin, let me ask you this:

Why did the Grateful Dead have two drummers?
In case one of them fell asleep.

Actually the two drummers sounding like sneakers in a dryer is more accurate and probably a better hipster joke. So step up your game son.

 

[RichZ]

and then dont forget storrsroars "I went to beaches before you guys even knew what beaches were"

Or tcf15 "Here's a link to video of all the beaches in the northeast, ranked by the eye appeal of the female regulars."

 

[storrsroars]

Actually the two drummers sounding like sneakers in a dryer is more accurate and probably a better hipster joke. So step up your game son.

But that's not a joke.

What's the difference between a wookie girl on tour and a washing machine?

If you throw a load in a washing machine, it doesn't follow you around all summer afterwards.

That's a joke...

Now I'm starting to see why your protege SJ has such weak material.

 

[August_West]

But that's not a joke.

What's the difference between a wookie girl on tour and a washing machine?

If you throw a load in a washing machine, it doesn't follow you around all summer afterwards.

That's a joke...

That actually not a joke either.

#tourlyphe


But keep trying my Pittsburgh friend.

 

[storrsroars]

That actually not a joke either.

#tourlyphe

But keep trying my Pittsburgh friend.

Actually that meets every criterion of a joke.

And now you want to break out esoteric hashtags...

WTF is happening to you man, you used to be sharp as a tack.

 

[August_West]

Actually that meets every criterion of a joke.

And now you want to break out esoteric hashtags...

WTF is happening to you man, you used to be sharp as a tack.

Whelp I’m just gonna finish this with a page out of your book my brother ( because you are on my shortlist of favorite BY peeps)

For the joke to work the punchline has to have absurdity. It doesn’t. It’s reality.


I got the joke before you knew about it.

 

[boba]

Actually that meets every criterion of a joke.

And now you want to break out esoteric hashtags...

WTF is happening to you man, you used to be sharp as a tack.

Umm, aren't jokes supposed to be, unh, funny? That's just misogyny dressed up as hippie punching. I understand in 3 tooth Pittsburgh, that passes as humor, but in the civilized world, it generates disdain.

The better one is the play on the old Catskills meme:
Man that show was awful, they missed lyrics, the rhythm kept bouncing, they were off key, and the song selection was mediocre.
Yeah, man... and it was so short!

Personally I like this German classic:

Hans calls the emergency line and says: "Oh no, I killed my friend! I was showing him my new gun and I shot him!"
"Hold on sir, don't be alarmed, are you sure he is dead?"
Hans says: "hold on..."
The operator hears a gunshot.
Hans returns and says: "yes."