OT: You only get to choose one condiment.

[uconnfan68]

Ken's Cocktail Sauce

Stuff can make leaves, dirt and pete moss taste good

Who's Pete Moss?

 

[August_West]

Salsa is way down on the list for me. Only certain brands are palatable and even then, it's not nearly as versatile as a decent barbeque sauce.

Let's use @UconnFanNVa 's list. Can you appreciate good bbq with Salsa? Not likely without a number of qualifiers. How about a hot dog or sausage? Nope. Chili is a much better option. Salsa is a probably a distant 4th...at best. Nachos? Obviously yes, but take it under advisement that Moe's gives away it's salsa for free, while the queso dip cost a couple bucks extra. Salsa on a cheese (ham)burger is only found where 1) the restaurant thinks they are being fancy but is really a Red Robin, or 2) a cookout host does not offer tomatoes (and the taste is still off). Fish? Not the traditional salsa.

That's 1 1/2 (credit for fish) for 5.

Do the same breakdown for BBQ sauce.
Slow cooked meats? That's what's the sauce is meant for.
Hot Dog or Sausage? Absolutely
Nachos? Probably not,
Cheeseburger? Bring it on.
Fish? May not be a typical use but yes, Grilled fish marinated in barbeque sauce is quite tasty. Besides UConnNVa chose tartar sauce, which normally accompanies a deep fried variety of fish. What also typically accompanies deep fried fish? French Fries. BBQ sauce is awesome not only on fries, but baked potato, and chips as well.

What's that? 6 for 7? 7 of 8?

Barbeque sauce is the Jose Oquendo of condiments: Not only good enough to succeed at the highest level (13 years in the Major Leagues) but versatile to pair with almost any cuisine. By comparison, salsa is John Rocker. Can only really do a couple of things, but not particularly well.

 

[Deepster]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

 

[Husky25]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

Had to be an affect of being high.

I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state.

 

[Milo65]

Blackies Hot Pepper Relish

 

[8893]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

Your study group seems to have overlooked that ranch dressing doesn't make anything better. It transforms interesting tastes into a bland nothingness.

 

[8893]

Wow that Inner Beauty stuff sounds awesome, need to track some of it down.

That's the problem. They don't sell it any more. The guy who started East Coast Grill in Cambridge created it and apparently was unable to continue to make it and sell it profitably, so it has been gone for several years now (except at East Coast Grill, I believe). I've tried many, many other hot sauces that were recommended as similar, and none of them have come close.

On an even sadder note, when googling East Coast Grill a moment ago I just learned that it is closing at the end of this month. That's a big loss. That place was an institution for some 30 years.

 

[Deepster]

Your study group seems to have overlooked that ranch dressing doesn't make anything better. It transforms interesting tastes into a bland nothingness.

Not many condiments do. Does hot sauce do anything other than cover a taste with a burning sensation? Doesn't BBQ sauce just make everything taste like BBQ sauce?

 

[methodology]

Chipolte tabasco sauce.

Use to use Cholula but not enough spice then sriracha is all spice not enough flavor

 

[Deepster]

Had to be an affect of being high.

I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state.

This isn't just for cookouts and hot dogs. It's the only condiment you are ever allowed to use.

Have fun putting BBQ sauce on vegetables or a salad.

 

[8893]

Not many condiments do. Does hot sauce do anything other than cover a taste with a burning sensation? Doesn't BBQ sauce just make everything taste like BBQ sauce?

The burning sensation is only one part of the attraction for me (but I do love the endorphins), and when balanced against other great flavors it enhances (for me). Obviously taste is personal, and ranch dressing is just one of those things that I have never found remotely interesting.

 

[Husky25]

This isn't just for cookouts and hot dogs. It's the only condiment you are ever allowed to use.

Have fun putting BBQ sauce on vegetables or a salad.

Read my post above. the cook out food is just one example out of the eight. By the way, A dab of BBQ sauce on roasted vegetables is phenomenal.

And as long as I'm only hypothetically eating one condiment for the rest of my life, I hypothetically will never eat a salad ever again. Seasoned sautéed spinach sound just fine.

 

[intlzncster]

I would probably go with salsa. But only if I get to make my own. Most packaged salsa sucks.

If I'm making my own, it's versatile enough for breakfast with eggs, use as a spread on sandwiches and on meats for dinner.

Triple bonus points if I get to have some variations on how I make the salsa.

Another sleeper could be guacamole. Avocados are versatile and the dip, spread can be used on a bunch of different veggies or meats.

Forcing me down to salsa or guac? I'm taking homemade guacamole.

Home made because I hate onions. That's a total copout topping or addition to any food. If you need to add onions to make it better, well, make it better to begin with.

Guys salsa and guacamole are NOT condiments. They are dips at worst, and an entire meal at best. Heck a good salsa has 10 ingredients or so. 4+ of which are condiments.

 

[bobbygt]

I bet I can guess what room in the house you spend the most time in (and it's not the kitchen).

 

[8893]

I'm definitely not considering guac a condiment; why would I want to choose between it and other things when I can have both it and other things?

I do eat a ton of avocados though. At least two a week. Always on my eggs on the weekends, as well as a Cobb salad during the week, and whenever else I can.

 

[Deepster]

Read my post above. the cook out food is just one example out of the eight. By the way, A dab of BBQ sauce on roasted vegetables is phenomenal.

And as long as I'm only hypothetically eating one condiment for the rest of my life, I hypothetically will never eat a salad ever again. Seasoned sautéed spinach sound just fine.

You said "I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state." Nothing in that quote would lead you to think about vegetables or any non-grilled food form.

I'm not going to try and sway anyone on the ranch dressing bandwagon, but I think some of the comments are short sighted. And is ranch a little bland? Sure. But try using only hot sauce or BBQ sauce as a condiment for one week. I bet you toss the bottle out the window by Wednesday.

 

[Dogdeacon]

Is a salad dressing a condiment?
If so why not even a mention for oil & vinegar or Italian dressing?
Seems like losing the ability to marinate could be the biggest unforeseen loss, you can make due with good steak or chicken, but you lose a ton of other interesting protein if you cannot use a marinade. I think it becomes a 3 way battle between Butter, Tomato Sauce & Oil & vinegar if the sauce pick governs prep-to-table-to-mouth.

So my question amounts to is the condiment choice the only option you have for putting on prepared foods AND for preparing foods or is it simply the only thing you are allowed to use in a 'dipping' or end-game situation? So you can order the pizza, but if you want to dip its gotta be mayonnaise or whatever.

Maybe specific examples would help, how can you prepare and eat the following;
Meats (i.e. can you flavor ribs with dry rub spices but not BBQ sauce?, Pork, fish all served dry?)
Starch (can you add tomato sauce to pasta, make rice/potatoes etc.. using butter but then cannot add the butter once its on your plate?)
Veggies seem to hammer this point home, if I don't choose butter can I never carmelize an onion again?

 

[Chin Diesel]

You said "I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state." Nothing in that quote would lead you to think about vegetables or any non-grilled food form.

I'm not going to try and sway anyone on the ranch dressing bandwagon, but I think some of the comments are short sighted. And is ranch a little bland? Sure. But try using only hot sauce or BBQ sauce as a condiment for one week. I bet you toss the bottle out the window by Wednesday.

It was a bit naïve on your part to start a thread knowing that your golf group came up with the wrong answer and then posing it as an open-ended question on this board.

 

[Deepster]

Is a salad dressing a condiment?
If so why not even a mention for oil & vinegar or Italian dressing?
Seems like losing the ability to marinate could be the biggest unforeseen loss, you can make due with good steak or chicken, but you lose a ton of other interesting protein if you cannot use a marinade. I think it becomes a 3 way battle between Butter, Tomato Sauce & Oil & vinegar if the sauce pick governs prep-to-table-to-mouth.

So my question amounts to is the condiment choice the only option you have for putting on prepared foods AND for preparing foods or is it simply the only thing you are allowed to use in a 'dipping' or end-game situation? So you can order the pizza, but if you want to dip its gotta be mayonnaise or whatever.

Maybe specific examples would help, how can you prepare and eat the following;
Meats (i.e. can you flavor ribs with dry rub spices but not BBQ sauce?, Pork, fish all served dry?)
Starch (can you add tomato sauce to pasta, make rice/potatoes etc.. using butter but then cannot add the butter once its on your plate?)
Veggies seem to hammer this point home, if I don't choose butter can I never carmelize an onion again?

I believe a case can be made for a dressing as a condiment. Ranch or Blue Cheese? With wings, dipping sauce, etc. Thousand Island on a Reuben or a burger? Sure. Do you ever use Italian dressing as a condiment? Or oil and vinegar? Not really.

And that's why I also feel that salsa qualifies (on hot dogs, on baked potatoes, to dip quesadillas into, etc.

 

[Husky25]

Disclaimer: I realize that my posts in this thread might seem a bit antagonistic, but they are not necessarily meant that way. I'm only having fun. There's still two more days until the next basketball game.

You said "I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state." Nothing in that quote would lead you to think about vegetables or any non-grilled food form.

Not that one. This one.

I'm not going to try and sway anyone on the ranch dressing bandwagon, but I think some of the comments are short sighted. And is ranch a little bland? Sure. But try using only hot sauce or BBQ sauce as a condiment for one week. I bet you toss the bottle out the window by Wednesday.

Sure you are. You said you came to a consensus. Consensus means everyone agrees or at least understands the rationale, and could be potentially persuaded to jump on the bandwagon. Just by you own admission that Ranch dressing is bland makes it a less ideal condiment to something else, whatever that may be. Also if one were to use any one single condiment exclusively for a week, whatever that might be, I would put money on them tossing the bottle by Wednesday.

Finally, the original rules state:

1) You can only use this condiment. You can't use it with other stuff to make other condiments (Ex: Ketchup + horseradish = cocktail sauce. The horseradish is a 2nd condiment.)

2) Remember this is breakfast, lunch, dinner and snacks. If you choose something that's not versatile (Ex: A-1 sauce), you're sacrificing lots of meals without a condiment.

With what breakfast food, pray tell, does ranch dressing pair well?

 

[Dogdeacon]

I think you are right that salad dressing is a condiment (oil & vinegar is used to dip bread, veggies & tasty coating for toasted buns holding burgers, dogs etc..) and potentially losing salads is a big reason to veer towards ranch or bleu cheese or oil & vinegar with the latter being more versatile (assuming garlic or lemon is allowed since it doesn't change the nature like adding horseradish to ketchup).
But then with a salad dressing of any kind total carnage happens to pizza & spaghetti, ie. sub ranch for tomato sauce = no more pasta!

I think I'm picking butter because its so necessary for cooking and although it doesn't add much it makes nothing worse

 

[Chin Diesel]

I think you are right that salad dressing is a condiment and potentially losing salads is a big reason to veer towards ranch or bleu cheese.
But then total carnage happens to pizza & spaghetti subbing ranch for tomato sauce!

I think I'm picking butter because its so necessary for cooking and although it doesn't add much it makes nothing worse

I don't think there was a requirement to use the condiment on everything. So you wouldn't use it on pizza.

 

[Dogdeacon]

I don't think there was a requirement to use the condiment on everything. So you wouldn't use it on pizza.

Sure you don't have to dip it, but what's under the cheese?

 

[Husky25]

I don't think there was a requirement to use the condiment on everything. So you wouldn't use it on pizza.

The requirement was versatility.

Many wayward souls use Ranch as a dipping sauce for pizza. Papa Johns (as a demonstration of how sh_tty their product is) includes it in deliveries. At least they did about 15 years ago.

Tomato sauce can be both an ingredient (Pizza, pasta and meatballs) and condiment (Calzone).

 

[Deepster]

With what breakfast food, pray tell, does ranch dressing pair well?

For me? I live a condiment-less breakfast life. Occasionally some hot sauce on eggs, mostly when hungover but that's it. I'm not missing anything at all by going ranch and not using it for breakfast.