The pushy parent isn’t limited to sports, unfortunately. My wife taught high school Spanish for about forty years. She was many times confronted by parents who cared nothing about established school rules, procedures, or teaching methods. They had another agenda. They adamantly cared that their kid not screw up a possible scholarship (and the resultant revenue savings for themselves). Because they thought grades equalled hard cash, they could be particularly vicious.
It wasn’t unusual for parents here to pull their kid out of school for a week so that the family could vacation together in the tropics. And of course, they demanded that the student be given all assignments in advance AND be allowed to submit assignments late. If necessary, she was expected to do one-on-one remedial lessons to get the kid caught up. Despite the additional teacher workloads this created, these parents were arrogant, self-centered and selfish to the point of absurdity. They railed at my wife, not because she wasn’t a good and dedicated teacher. They were upset with her because Spanish isn’t a subject where parents can readily do the homework for their student-athletes and allow their kid to slide through. It’s the same for teachers of other challenging subjects. If the grade isn’t an “A,” parents leap to question the ability of the teacher, not the ability or attentiveness of their student. It’s a favorite tactic of the “helicopter parent” to show up at the school multiple times every week to argue every last point on every assignment. Their goal is to wear out the teachers’ resolve and thus gain favorable treatment. School principals don’t help the situation much at all.
Here in the Midwest, far too many high schools are headed by men whose main leadership qualification is that they coached (typically unsuccessfully) football or some other sport. They threaten or lean on teachers to extend special treatment to athletes, and they side with the pushy parent out of convenience or political comfort. Their might-makes-right attitudes are not a solution. They are a major part of the problem. The “good ‘ol boys network” is in full force.
I enjoyed teaching at the college level. Under law, I could not discuss most details of a student’s academic progress with parents. I never outright told a parent to “get lost.” But I did make it absolutely clear that I dealt with students, not with parents.