The Judge Speaks | The Boneyard

The Judge Speaks

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Your honorable Judge has shaken his robe out of the moth balls and loyal Hangman Swami has plenty of rusty piano wire at the ready. It has been a while since we stretched some necks here so let’s get into it and administer some good ol' fashioned Boneyard justice.

Our beloved Huskies are back in the Big East and concurrently back in the NCAA tournament and the aftershocks of that are rippling through the Big East also-ran fan bases right now. And, while I searched for this year’s inspiration, I admitted something to myself that wasn’t easy to admit.

I love Tampa Bay Tom Brady.

This year, Tom Brady won a 7th ring. And he proved he didn’t need the crotchedy old coach to do it. Just like Danny Hurley is proving we don’t need our crotchedy old coach anymore. Like TB12 back in the playoffs, we are back in the NCAA tourney and Taliek Brown is on our bench. What number was he when he played? #12. The postseason is a familiar place for us all to be….but a new era for sure. Just like Tampa Bay Tommy. And let's get something straight. As a lifelong Jets fan, Tom Brady has caused me more pain and heartache than any other athlete alive. And, still I love me some TB12 right now. Drunker than Dogfather at a BYC during the boat parade, tossing the Lombardi around like it was a loaf of bread? He is our spirit animal the rest of the way. A smug winner that simply knows that he’s better than everyone else. And, as we enter our first NCAA tourney since 2016? All I can think of is this clip….



TB12 and his buddy Gronk with a grin on their faces, shrugging that we’re back and we can’t be stopped. So let the Tampa Bay Tommy pics flow. Memes. Gifs. Profile pics. The more the better as we fuel this Mojo fire heading into next week. The words of the background music in that clip? “We ain’t goin’ nowhere, we ain’t goin’ nowhere. We can’t be stopped now cuz it’s bad boys for life.” Deal with it, folks. UConn is back.

And that brings us to stretching some necks. When I thought about this? Your Judge got mad. And when I get mad? I am vindictive. Grab your torches and pitchforks and bring the following Yarders to the Hangman’s gallows.

@BostonBay - I don’t even know who this is. But his post “Hurley will never take UConn to the next level” post infuriated me. @CTBasketball and @Deadrody? You asked Judge Deepster to "hang him high” and your wish is granted. He’s a clickbait troll and he’s hanging just to get the kinks out of Hangman Swami’s trusty noose.

@RyanFoul - Another troll who posted the “Having a hard time learning to love Hurley” thread this week. I’m no Pollyanna, but at this point in our program and season? This is steaming hot garbage and I knew he was being strung up since I first saw the thread title.

BostonBay and RyanFoul. They don’t post much, but if they do? That thread needs to be flooded with pictures of Coach Hurley. Don’t let them utter a single thought the rest of the way. Shove our coach right down their idiot throats.

Now that I’m warmed up?

@XLCenterFan - He agreed with BostonBay about Hurley not taking the program to the next level. And he’s just a blowhard windbag on plenty of other topics. He the guy that walks into your local neighborhood watering hole and everyone groans. Every stock he picks, makes money. Every bet he makes, wins. Every restaurant he goes to is the best. Well, I don’t like him and, at the end of the day, I don’t think he’s good for the Mojo. So he swings from the end of a rope. Effective immediately, he changes his signature to say “I am a message board gas bag. Please don’t listen to a word I say.” This has to be in place until the final buzzer of the last game of our season.

@upstater - Earlier in the post, I spoke poorly of Bill Belichick and insinuated Tom Brady was successful when he wasn’t wearing a Pats jersey or playing in New England. No one here will take that to heart harder than the biggest Patriots hump on the board. Effective immediately, he changes his signature to say “Tampa Bay Tom is better than Bill Belichick”.

Hangman Swami, prepare the gallows. Justice is served. 6 wins from now, we will all be as drunk as my boy Tommy staggering onto shore.

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Did Upstater just get hung? Fudge. That is one healthy sacrifice - that dude has been here 15 years or more. God save the queen. Do this.
 
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How is this fudging clown still posting? He posted his own picture in his Avatar. It's an "avatar," not a "clownatar." Cut his Testiculos off.
What does the B in your name stand for? BUM! I also bet that's you in your avatar...breaking cameras since 1988.
 
I am stunned, absolutely stunned that the judge let @Dream Jobbed 2.0 walk. It’s a miscarriage of justice. He promised that if Bouk, Akok or Jackson played a minute of time for us he would dump “a whole bottle of Frank’s red hot“ in his eyes. They did; he didn’t. How is it even possible that he isn’t swinging in a justice loving Boneyard?

That said, I feel like the judge is out of practice. Protocol says we named the hangers, give them a “fair“ trial, and then sentenced them. The Jurrdge just skipped directly to sentence. Sure, the trail is kind of a foregone conclusion, but watching the defendant squirm in the hopes that they may wiggle their way out of their sentence generates mojo. Why the rush? Justice delayed is justice enhanced, I say.

Finally, hanging trolls? Is that The level to which we’re stooping? The correct response to troll is “ thank you for your interest in Connecticut basketball.“ We don’t give them the attention that they’re seeking.

I am afraid that Deep is out of practice after a long layoff. This has the reek of “shoo shoo orange flu“ written all over it.
 
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I am stunned, absolutely stunned that the judge let @Dream Jobbed 2.0 walk. It’s a miscarriage of justice. He promised that if Bouk, Akok or Jackson played a minute of time for us he would dump “a whole bottle of Frank’s red hot“ in his eyes. They did; he didn’t. How is it even possible that he isn’t swinging in a justice loving Boneyard?

That said, I feel like the judge is out of practice. Protocol says we named the hangers, give them a “fair“ trial, and then sentenced them. The Jurrdge just skipped directly to settings. Sure, the trail is kind of a foregone conclusion, but watching the defendant squirm in the hopes that they may wiggle their way out of their sentence generates mojo. Why the rush? Justice delayed is justice enhanced, I say.

Finally, hanging trolls? Is that The level to which we’re stooping? The correct response to troll is “ thank you for your interest in Connecticut basketball.“ We don’t give them the attention that they’re seeking.

I am afraid that Deep is out of practice after a long layoff. This has the reek of “shoo shoo orange flu“ written all over it.
flirty flirting GIF
 
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