OT: You only get to choose one condiment.

[MrP]

Gravy.


I know it's a sauce, don't care

 

[Waquoit]

Butter.

That's not a condiment, it's a food group.

 

[alexd]

Gauc is not a "condiment" is it? That's like saying hummus is a condiment

Really.....you might as well peel a banana, squish it up in a bowl and call that a condiment.

 

[Jerry1714]

Blue cheese, may be on an island on this, but I eat a lot of wings

 

[superjohn]

Got hooked on Salsa Lizano when we honeymooned in Costa Rica and have been a regular user ever since. I have a couple big bottles shipped every now and again to keep it in stock.

And that's actually the kind of thing I had in mind as an "everything" sauce, because that certainly is a three-meals-and-a-snack sauce. The reason I chose Inner Beauty instead is because it fills those same sweet, salty, spicy and consistency boxes but is considerably hotter. It really was the world's most perfect sauce imo, but probably too hot for many because it's made with Scotch Bonnet/Habanero peppers. But it also has mango and fruit juice for great sweetness, and mustard, vinegar, molasses, honey, oil and some great savory spices like curry, tumeric, allspice, cumin and chili powder.

As for @Deepster and @August_West asking where the ketchup fans are, most of us said that we liked it, not that we wanted to marry it. I would want something spicier than ketchup it I only had one.

Wow that Inner Beauty stuff sounds awesome, need to track some of it down.

 

[6xChamps]

Very important question: if I don't choose buffalo/hot sauce then can I still eat wings tossed in buffalo??

 

[zyron]

.

 

[Gringo]

Not sure if it's considered a condiment, but I'm going with guacamole.

 

[Goat]

 

[Chin Diesel]

Mrs. Chin is going Bubba from Forrest Gump over honey or maple syrup. She thinks maple syrup on steak is acceptable.

 

[Chin Diesel]

Gauc is not a "condiment" is it? That's like saying hummus is a condiment

If salsa is a condiment then guac has to be considered a condiment.

Hummus is very versatile too.

Blue Cheese and Ranch have just as many food items combined as guacamole.

Same with mayo- Eggs, oil, vinegar

 

[Chin Diesel]

That's not a condiment, it's the food group.

Fixed it for you.

 

[Chin Diesel]

Sweet Baby Ray's.

While I wouldn't pick it for the purposes of this thread Sweet Baby Ray's is phenomenal.

Unless you have ribbons and trophies for your sauce, don't waste your time. SBR is better.

 

[61cygni]

Put me down for Sriracha. If it wasn't for rule #1 it might be Sriracha/Mayonnaise.

Runners-up:
Sambal
XO sauce
Kecap Manis

 

[pnow15]

Whipped cream.

 

[uconnfan68]

Ken's Cocktail Sauce

Stuff can make leaves, dirt and pete moss taste good

Who's Pete Moss?

 

[August_West]

Salsa is way down on the list for me. Only certain brands are palatable and even then, it's not nearly as versatile as a decent barbeque sauce.

Let's use @UconnFanNVa 's list. Can you appreciate good bbq with Salsa? Not likely without a number of qualifiers. How about a hot dog or sausage? Nope. Chili is a much better option. Salsa is a probably a distant 4th...at best. Nachos? Obviously yes, but take it under advisement that Moe's gives away it's salsa for free, while the queso dip cost a couple bucks extra. Salsa on a cheese (ham)burger is only found where 1) the restaurant thinks they are being fancy but is really a Red Robin, or 2) a cookout host does not offer tomatoes (and the taste is still off). Fish? Not the traditional salsa.

That's 1 1/2 (credit for fish) for 5.

Do the same breakdown for BBQ sauce.
Slow cooked meats? That's what's the sauce is meant for.
Hot Dog or Sausage? Absolutely
Nachos? Probably not,
Cheeseburger? Bring it on.
Fish? May not be a typical use but yes, Grilled fish marinated in barbeque sauce is quite tasty. Besides UConnNVa chose tartar sauce, which normally accompanies a deep fried variety of fish. What also typically accompanies deep fried fish? French Fries. BBQ sauce is awesome not only on fries, but baked potato, and chips as well.

What's that? 6 for 7? 7 of 8?

Barbeque sauce is the Jose Oquendo of condiments: Not only good enough to succeed at the highest level (13 years in the Major Leagues) but versatile to pair with almost any cuisine. By comparison, salsa is John Rocker. Can only really do a couple of things, but not particularly well.

 

[Deepster]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

 

[Husky25]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

Had to be an affect of being high.

I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state.

 

[Milo65]

Blackies Hot Pepper Relish

 

[8893]

The winner of my initial debate on this was ranch dressing (80shusky nailed that one).

Doesn't overpower like hot sauce. Versatile. Sandwich topper, dipping sauce, dressing for salads or vegetables.

Of course, the point really got sold on us when we were drunk and high eating pepperoni pizza drenched in buttermilk ranch late one night, but I still think it holds water.

Your study group seems to have overlooked that ranch dressing doesn't make anything better. It transforms interesting tastes into a bland nothingness.

 

[8893]

Wow that Inner Beauty stuff sounds awesome, need to track some of it down.

That's the problem. They don't sell it any more. The guy who started East Coast Grill in Cambridge created it and apparently was unable to continue to make it and sell it profitably, so it has been gone for several years now (except at East Coast Grill, I believe). I've tried many, many other hot sauces that were recommended as similar, and none of them have come close.

On an even sadder note, when googling East Coast Grill a moment ago I just learned that it is closing at the end of this month. That's a big loss. That place was an institution for some 30 years.

 

[Deepster]

Your study group seems to have overlooked that ranch dressing doesn't make anything better. It transforms interesting tastes into a bland nothingness.

Not many condiments do. Does hot sauce do anything other than cover a taste with a burning sensation? Doesn't BBQ sauce just make everything taste like BBQ sauce?

 

[methodology]

Chipolte tabasco sauce.

Use to use Cholula but not enough spice then sriracha is all spice not enough flavor

 

[Deepster]

Had to be an affect of being high.

I would never (nor would anyone I know, an observation of the 100s of tailgates and cookouts I've hosted/attended) put ranch dressing on a hot dog, sausage, or slow cooked meat in a sober state.

This isn't just for cookouts and hot dogs. It's the only condiment you are ever allowed to use.

Have fun putting BBQ sauce on vegetables or a salad.

 

[8893]

Not many condiments do. Does hot sauce do anything other than cover a taste with a burning sensation? Doesn't BBQ sauce just make everything taste like BBQ sauce?

The burning sensation is only one part of the attraction for me (but I do love the endorphins), and when balanced against other great flavors it enhances (for me). Obviously taste is personal, and ranch dressing is just one of those things that I have never found remotely interesting.

 

[Husky25]

This isn't just for cookouts and hot dogs. It's the only condiment you are ever allowed to use.

Have fun putting BBQ sauce on vegetables or a salad.

Read my post above. the cook out food is just one example out of the eight. By the way, A dab of BBQ sauce on roasted vegetables is phenomenal.

And as long as I'm only hypothetically eating one condiment for the rest of my life, I hypothetically will never eat a salad ever again. Seasoned sautéed spinach sound just fine.

 

[intlzncster]

I would probably go with salsa. But only if I get to make my own. Most packaged salsa sucks.

If I'm making my own, it's versatile enough for breakfast with eggs, use as a spread on sandwiches and on meats for dinner.

Triple bonus points if I get to have some variations on how I make the salsa.

Another sleeper could be guacamole. Avocados are versatile and the dip, spread can be used on a bunch of different veggies or meats.

Forcing me down to salsa or guac? I'm taking homemade guacamole.

Home made because I hate onions. That's a total copout topping or addition to any food. If you need to add onions to make it better, well, make it better to begin with.

Guys salsa and guacamole are NOT condiments. They are dips at worst, and an entire meal at best. Heck a good salsa has 10 ingredients or so. 4+ of which are condiments.

 

[bobbygt]

I bet I can guess what room in the house you spend the most time in (and it's not the kitchen).

 

[8893]

I'm definitely not considering guac a condiment; why would I want to choose between it and other things when I can have both it and other things?

I do eat a ton of avocados though. At least two a week. Always on my eggs on the weekends, as well as a Cobb salad during the week, and whenever else I can.