OT: Work Place Irritations

[Chin Diesel]

This board needs more OT: mojo.

Who in their right mind brews a pot of coffee using the standard Bunn brewing system that when the pot is full, you can see through the pot?

This isn't complicated stuff. The coffee tub is even labeled. 2 scoops per pot.

My other major beef? Co-workers who use the interwebs on their cell phones during work pretending to do work with their screens pulled up to some official site. Meanwhile they're actually screwing off on message boards. And when you bust them, they quickly put the phone down with some BS excuse about responding to a message from their spouse about a kid forgetting lunch at home.

 

[polycom]

When people bring in lunch that smells horrible and eating it at their desks. You know it smells terrible, I know it smells terrible just be a little respectful.

People who drown themselves in perfume or cologne like they are going to the bar.

 

[ConnHuskBask]

My other major beef? Co-workers who use the interwebs on their cell phones during work pretending to do work with their screens pulled up to some official site. Meanwhile they're actually screwing off on message boards. And when you bust them, they quickly put the phone down with some BS excuse about responding to a message from their spouse about a kid forgetting lunch at home.

... Boss?

 

[CTMike]

The office nail clipper.

The guy that wipes his boogers above the urinal.

People are the worst.

 

[Kitaman]

How about that pretty co-worker who happens to have bad breath on the one day she approaches you for information. Or that little particle in her pretty nose you desperately want to tell her to remove.

 

[HuskyBandDad]

... Boss?

He just thinks he is.

 

[UC313]

No heat in my office today. A balmy 57 degrees and falling. I need a cuddle buddy.

 

[Chin Diesel]

... Boss?

He just thinks he is.

Oh no. Just figured someone was going to point out the irony of bitxhing about co-workers while posting to a message board while at work.

And we've all approached a co-worker who we know was gaffing off on their cell phone and the second you approach them they quickly put it down and make up a BS excuse as to what they were doing.

 

[CL82]

Well very earlier in my career my office was plagued by...

The nibbler.

You know the post meeting danish that gets put in the break room? We had a person who'd go in a gnaw at one or two like a rat. By the end of the day there might be a half dozen "nibbled" danish in there. Really? Just take the damn thing and throw out what you don't want.

Eventually we staged a sting. After a meeting wrapped, we had the guy whose office was across from the break room go in and check after every person came out. It turned out to be a vaguely hot, if slightly overweight girl. She must have heard about the sting operation because it stopped shortly after that.

 

[August_West]

I still can't get over this new trend of people naming their food. People are weird.
I just came from the break room and had a sandwich some goofball named "Brett".

(at least that is what was written on the bag)

 

[Chin Diesel]

Well very earlier in my career my office was plagued by...

The nibbler.

You know the post meeting danish that gets put in the break room? We had a person who'd go in a gnaw at one or two like a rat. By the end of the day there might be a half dozen "nibbled" danish in there. Really? Just take the damn thing and throw out what you don't want.

Eventually we staged a sting. After a meeting wrapped, we had the guy whose office was across from the break room go in and check after every person came out. It turned out to be a vaguely hot, if slightly overweight girl. She must have heard about the sting operation because it stopped shortly after that.

Occasionally people will bring in 2 dozen donuts for the break room. I don't have the historical context that led to two dozens being the quantity of choice; it just is.

Besides the obvious faux pas of getting powdered donuts that no one will eat, occasionally someone will break out a plastic knife and cut a donut in half. Because in the grand scheme of things, the extra calories, fat and sugar of eating the other half will blow a person's diet. They'll even leave the knife in the box so that everyone knows they were sanitary and didn't pull it apart by hand.

 

[HuskyBandDad]

Occasionally people will bring in 2 dozen donuts for the break room. I don't have the historical context that led to two dozens being the quantity of choice; it just is.

Besides the obvious faux pas of getting powdered donuts that no one will eat, occasionally someone will break out a plastic knife and cut a donut in half. Because in the grand scheme of things, the extra calories, fat and sugar of eating the other half will blow a person's diet. They'll even leave the knife in the box so that everyone knows they were sanitary and didn't pull it apart by hand.

Eat 1/2 of a donut ? Never happens in my world.

 

[Husky25]

Static electricity shock by the door handle
Cases of the Mondays
Nina in Accounts Payable.
Milton listening to his radio at a reasonable volume
Married squirrels
Paper jams when there are no paper jams
TPS report cover sheets
Michael Bolton's version of, "When a Man Loves a Woman."
Co-workers who fake like they are having coffee, when all they really want is 23 TBSP sugar.
Payroll virus software that doesn't work like I want it to.
Metallic sky-blue Porsche

Last but not least:
Eight bosses (especially when they call me out *ing around on my phone when my computer is showing the office Intranet, forcing me to come up with a bad excuse.).

I could go on...

 

[1999.2004.2011]

The office nail clipper.

This x1000. Someone in the office across the way from me does this, and I cringe every time I hear it

 

[TRest]

Eat 1/2 of a donut ? Never happens in my world.

We have many donut splitters at my office. My pet peeve are the guys who piss all over the toilet seats. WTF, are you from Louisville or something?

 

[allday2345]

When people think it's okay to approach me in the morning

 

[intlzncster]

People who think (or are oblivious to the fact) that there should be no work done on opening week of the NCAA Tournament. Thursday and Friday should resemble the day after Christmas.

Any self respecting human knows that.

 

[David 76]

expecting me to work!

 

[HuskyHawk]

My office since August has 3 windows (yay me), but the thermostat is out in the hall. On a cold, sunny day, the heat runs, and solar power heats the office to about 90. On a cold cloudy day, it barely hits 60 as the cold comes right through the glass. Some days it is freezing in the morning and hotter than hell by 1:00.

 

[KemBuckets21]

When people bring in lunch that smells horrible and eating it at their desks. You know it smells terrible, I know it smells terrible just be a little respectful.

People who drown themselves in perfume or cologne like they are going to the bar.

I have to second this. I had co workers who were trying to stay skinny who just eat hard boiled eggs with some salt. Greatttt.

 

[8893]

One-ply.

 

[tiger8mush]

old geezer in a cube across from me:
- clips his nails no less than 3x a week
- uses speaker phone for EVERY conversation whether its 2 mins or 2 hours
- spends probably 4 hours a day on his cell phone and his clicking is audible. All I hear all day is a faint "click ... click ... click .. " . If you are going to be non-productive, do it quietly please!

 

[Chin Diesel]

We have many donut splitters at my office. My pet peeve are the guys who piss all over the toilet seats. what, are you from Louisville or something?

I work around a lot of younger military guys who eat about 400g of protein a day.
You walk in to a stall and there is dookie that has been power squatted and caked on to the bowl about 3/4" thick.
Even the cleaning company contracted to clean bathrooms can't/won't clean it off.

 

[TRest]

I work around a lot of younger military guys who eat about 400g of protein a day.
You walk in to a stall and there is dookie that has been power squatted and caked on to the bowl about 3/4" thick.
Even the cleaning company contracted to clean bathrooms can't/won't clean it off.

Thanks for the visual.

Here's another: every office has that one guy who floats from office to office and cubicle to cubicle, just shooting the shat with everyone too polite to tell him to get lost. If those guys all end up in one department together you are going out of business.

 

[SubbaBub]

On the phone thing. This is a fact of life in this day and age. Before they used to just start off into space or have their head down pretending to work.

I will only make it an issue if someone isn't getting their work done or is watching Netflix. There may be line jobs where zero tolerance is the necessity but in an office environment you need to let certain things go for the benefit of office morale and employee retention.

My advice to a former military guy transitioning to private work is to worry about you. Their issues will benefit you. Though my experience with former Gung how types is that if they dial it back to 80%, they will find the sweet spot between productivity and getting along with the team.