Insight...Walking in another's shoes...I really like JS' post about Charde, because it offers well thought out insight on what possibly may have gone on with Charde during her tenure at UConn. For me the reader and fan, I think that it also illustrates why the UConn program is for some players, but not for others. There is no ill intent against Charde in this last sentence at all. It just is what it is.
I would like to take a crack at Caroline's predicament, from a personal experience of my own.
Last year around this time, I lost my voice completely. I was unable to utter any sound whatsoever - if I needed to give a cabbie instructions, I had to write them down (and hope that the driver could read english), I couldn't use the telephone, and as it was during that bad stretch of weather in NYC, if I fell down and got hurt, I could not call out for help. Let me add here that I am a professional singer. Needless to say, I was unable to sing and lost quite a bit of work, not to mention that singing was something I did all the time, where ever I went. It is as much a part of my existance as breathing.
Four weeks after the onset of this illness, I was able to make myself understood, but my voice as I knew it was still a long way from returning. In fact, I didn't start to speak in a semi-normal voice until about late March, and as for singing, to this day I am still not fully recovered. I started taking singing jobs in early fall, but lost my voice again during Yom Kippur services for which I was hired to sing. My voice is not the same, I do not have the same control oover it or confidence I once had for when it feels like it, the voice just quits on me.
I cannot begin to tell you how frustrating it is to know how to sing properly and with emotion and expression, but when I try, the voice does not cooperate. I have to be careful and cautious when I sing, and I cannot take risks and let 'er rip as I once did. I am limited by this problem.
I feel like a part of me is missing, and I struggle with this every day. Technically I am cured, healthy and able, yet I know that I do not enjoy the facility I once posessed. It is a loss.
I look at Caroline's struggles and I see myself. Part of some of my jobs as a singer is to be a leader of a section or group. I know that from personal experience the difficulty if leading when internally struggling/dealing with technical issues. This makes it easier to understand her situation and sympathize.
When she was recovering, it was easy to lead, but now that she, too must perform her tasks on the floor , it may be asking quite a lot to do both.
Caroline would not accept my sympathy because of who she is so I won't offer it up, yet she certainly has my understanding.