Since I was the one on the soap box about stuff, I wanted to comment here.
This type of post is completely reasonable and a legitimate take on things. There's no reason we can't be critical or suggest we think one player should get minutes over another (unless they are bat crazy ideas like Hamilton playing the two and Facey playing the three - but those get sorted out just fine by masses) as long as that criticism is constructive or at least not personal.
But calling out players, making fun of players, attacking players isn't fine.
T0 summarize:
OK Post - Phil is playing poorly this year and it's really time to see Rakim get more minutes.
Not OK Post - Phil is useless and should never see another minute on the court for UConn.
Exactly! The posters who are guilty of this behavior have a problem distinguishing the difference.
Lots of reasons why. One reason is that some have developed the habit of putting someone down to make themselves feel better. Another is to attract attention to themselves. There are other reasons but suffice it to say it's very hard to change these type of behaviors.
Some of us recognize this is a minority of the same people posting in this forum. But others of us don't take the time to realize it's the same dudes and come away with the impression that the numbers are greater.
We cannot change others. It's up to the individuals with "negative" behavior to understand the detriments that their behavior creates both for society as a whole and for themselves as individuals. It's no different than alcohol addiction. Someone not addicted can see it in someone else and try to change that person, but no change can begin unless the person with the addiction recognizes the problem and makes the determination to try and change.
We do all sorts of things to force people to look at themselves such as humor, ridicule, isolation, marginalization, ignoring them, punishment. Those methods may have to be employed at times, but the better modality is patience and guidance. I must confess there are times when I want to get down and dirty as opposed to be a shining light. I want to feel the emotional satisfaction we derive when we hurt others. It's quite satisfying. But it's wrong. Which is why the more successful groups understand this and work together in pulling each other up as opposed to putting others down. None of us are perfect and we all need each other. No different than a team in which even the bench players can contribute to an outcome.
Personally I find this forum a perfect blend of personalities. It has vibrancy, intelligence, raw emotion, compassion, passion and many other positive attributes. Yes it has flaws. But we frequently move forward in a positive direction. It's interesting to see the stalwarts on the football forum who are fans who know how to handle adversity. They've had to with the last four plus seasons. The bandwagon fans are gone from that forum. And the women's bb forum is the polar opposite. The biggest charge they have is the Vols and the way Tennessee had dealt with Geno and Maya Moore. That still brings the strongest reaction there many years after the events.
The men's bb forum is unique imo. It's the roller coaster forum. Extreme highs and extreme lows in a very short period of time. Human nature struggles more in this type of environment. You know what your getting in the other two forums (and yes I know the football success under RE). I'm talking about the rate of change. Championship, post season ban, loss of a legacy, championship, hero worship of a new coach, divorce. All in less than four years. That's extreme and a whipsaw set of circumstances impacting the basic drive to create some sort of normalcy in our lives. So kudos to this forum even as we still find ourselves working through things. This forum has definitely taken the stairs to fandom.
