Fishy
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- Aug 24, 2011
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All right.
I'm actually pretty calm during hoop games these days. Football still sets me off, especially the Vikings, but otherwise, I'm not even remotely as demonstrative as I used to be.
1) I watched the Laettner game at my parents' house with my younger brother. I didn't really react after the shot, but my brother started to laugh and I whipped the remote at him. I missed him and the remote sailed through the family room door, past the kitchen and into the dining room where my dad was sitting. It arrived there in four or five pieces. Trying to be helpful, he says, "Most of the remote is in here now!" as if it up and walked there on its own. You simply could not fluster the man.
2) When I was first married, my wife decorated the living room of our apartment with these wicker baskets that held pillows, dried flowers and whatever the hell else. We were married in May of 1998 - by the end of the 98-99 season, I had kicked all of the baskets. I vaporized one when the Vikings lost to the Falcons in the NFL championship game, I got one stuck on my foot when Khalid slipped against Miami and I stomped the handle of one when Quentin Hall hit his three with a minute left in the Elite Eight.
We had the downstairs neighbors up one night and there was a game on - I wanted to kick something, but I was on my best behavior so I kinda sideways kicked one of the baskets and it made a little crunching noise - the neighbor's wife perks up and says, "So that's what that noise is! We always wondered...".
3) The last time I remember any sort of outburst was in our current house. I don't remember the game, but I had a tantrum and threw the remote at the front door - I ended up hitting the wall and had to repair the divot. The remote cracked and we still have to use an Exacto knife to cut the tape away whenever the batteries have to be changed.
I kinda grew out of all that and eased into profanity which my wife enjoyed even less than the wanton destruction. I'm creative with profanity and I've said things that have specifically horrified my inlaws to such a degree that my wife tries to make me go upstairs to watch UConn or the Vikings when they're here. They're here this weekend and although I'll probably be perfectly fine, the Vikings/Packers game tomorrow night has my wife on edge.
I'm actually pretty calm during hoop games these days. Football still sets me off, especially the Vikings, but otherwise, I'm not even remotely as demonstrative as I used to be.
1) I watched the Laettner game at my parents' house with my younger brother. I didn't really react after the shot, but my brother started to laugh and I whipped the remote at him. I missed him and the remote sailed through the family room door, past the kitchen and into the dining room where my dad was sitting. It arrived there in four or five pieces. Trying to be helpful, he says, "Most of the remote is in here now!" as if it up and walked there on its own. You simply could not fluster the man.
2) When I was first married, my wife decorated the living room of our apartment with these wicker baskets that held pillows, dried flowers and whatever the hell else. We were married in May of 1998 - by the end of the 98-99 season, I had kicked all of the baskets. I vaporized one when the Vikings lost to the Falcons in the NFL championship game, I got one stuck on my foot when Khalid slipped against Miami and I stomped the handle of one when Quentin Hall hit his three with a minute left in the Elite Eight.
We had the downstairs neighbors up one night and there was a game on - I wanted to kick something, but I was on my best behavior so I kinda sideways kicked one of the baskets and it made a little crunching noise - the neighbor's wife perks up and says, "So that's what that noise is! We always wondered...".
3) The last time I remember any sort of outburst was in our current house. I don't remember the game, but I had a tantrum and threw the remote at the front door - I ended up hitting the wall and had to repair the divot. The remote cracked and we still have to use an Exacto knife to cut the tape away whenever the batteries have to be changed.
I kinda grew out of all that and eased into profanity which my wife enjoyed even less than the wanton destruction. I'm creative with profanity and I've said things that have specifically horrified my inlaws to such a degree that my wife tries to make me go upstairs to watch UConn or the Vikings when they're here. They're here this weekend and although I'll probably be perfectly fine, the Vikings/Packers game tomorrow night has my wife on edge.
