OT - CT Divorce Asset Distribution

[OkaForPrez]

God knows where this thread will go, but if there's one thing this board has in spades, its Lawyers, Divorced Men and Divorced Lawyer men, so I need advice. I've done as much independent research online as possible and while the variables that are considered are clear, there is no help for establishing precedent. Also hearing from the peanut gallery that CT leans 50/50 no matter what.

The details:

4 years, no kids, no debt, both have strong careers and incomes, completely financially independent.

I entered the marriage with 70% of the assets and have made 70% of the income during the life of the marriage. I'm 5 years older.

A true 50/50 split would theoretically be even more in her advantage than a a relative 50/50 given our age difference and the fact that I should be ahead in retirement savings etc never-mind its significant difference from what we've accumulated individually as one financial entity.

The divorce is amicable and we are negotiating well and will seek arbitration and joint council, but I still want to be aware of the doomsday scenario here. If something shifts rapidly and this does go to litigation, is it open and shut 50/50 despite being an equitable distribution state? Is there a range of likely outcomes given the information provided?

If you know who our resident lawyers are can you please tag them?

Good thing I'm already in this support group huh?

If you guys need me, I'll be over here.

 

[temery]

You've probably already googled this , but just in case ..,

http://www.divorcenet.com/states/connecticut/ctfaq08

http://www.jud.ct.gov/lawlib/Notebooks/Pathfinders/EquitableDistribution.pdf

 

[Dove]

When I wake up each morning my wife says "Damn!!"

She makes more than me. I ain't leaving her.

Good luck okie!

 

[Jaker]

Sometimes things just don't work out and it is better to admit it and end it and move on before it gets really messy with kids.

 

[Duncan Idaho]

Sorry to hear. I have seen judgments of 60/40 splits based higher future earnings potential but with different circumstances i.e. length of marriage, kids...

 

[Kitaman]

Good thing I'm already in this support group huh?

Here's a beter support group: linky

There may be other online help sites (perhaps even better). Every problem is best handled with support and being around someone who has been where you are and are going. And divorice is not a small problem. Thankfully (in a way i guess) its a common problem that's been solved for centuries.

 

[FDNY99]

I was in your EXACT same case...we did our's on our own..no mediator what so ever. I gave up some assets to walk away...but that was of my own choosing. Unless she hits you with a ridiculous alimony demand...you should be ok. Just remember if she makes any noise about your pension...you have a right to hers as well. Make sure if you feel things getting the least bet contested you go see a good divorce lawyer for a consultation. Sometimes that is money well spent. Good luck Oka!!

God knows where this thread will go, but if there's one thing this board has in spades, its Lawyers, Divorced Men and Divorced Lawyer men, so I need advice. I've done as much independent research online as possible and while the variables that are considered are clear, there is no help for establishing precedent. Also hearing from the peanut gallery that CT leans 50/50 no matter what.

The details:

4 years, no kids, no debt, both have strong careers and incomes, completely financially independent.

I entered the marriage with 70% of the assets and have made 70% of the income during the life of the marriage. I'm 5 years older.

A true 50/50 split would theoretically be even more in her advantage than a a relative 50/50 given our age difference and the fact that I should be ahead in retirement savings etc never-mind its significant difference from what we've accumulated individually as one financial entity.

The divorce is amicable and we are negotiating well and will seek arbitration and joint council, but I still want to be aware of the doomsday scenario here. If something shifts rapidly and this does go to litigation, is it open and shut 50/50 despite being an equitable distribution state? Is there a range of likely outcomes given the information provided?

If you know who our resident lawyers are can you please tag them?

Good thing I'm already in this support group huh?

If you guys need me, I'll be over here.

 

[Fishy]

"If something shifts rapidly..."

 

[Deepster]

Sounds like with her working and no kids, with no messy stuff like rental properties or weird investments or business ventures, in an amicable split you two should have a pretty cookie cutter process.

I guess the problems would start when: a) you don't want to give her as much as you should or b) she wants more than she deserves. Again, with nothing else clouding up the situation, I find it hard to believe you couldn't easily work through that.

I would also suggest that, if you haven't already, you should go talk to a lawyer on your own. I'd want an opinion from my "own guy" and not a joint lawyer to prepare me for any potential pitfalls. And also to have someone informed and at the ready if, unfortuately, the mediation broke down.

 

[TasteofUConn]

Keep the lawyers out as long as possible, which may be all the way.
I'm not up on CT law, but generally the key thing is the Marital Separation Agreement. I always suggest getting that signed before doing anything else. It pretty much nails down who gets what. It's a binding contract that you could enforce later.
If you or she gets lawyers involved, the lawyers can make it contentious (intentionally or not). There is enough information on the Internet to draft a good MSA agreement without using lawyers. It needs to say several thing, but most of it is common sense - the final ownership of all assets and debt should be given, who gets the marital residence. Who will assume debt.
The right lawyer can get an agreement signed for you. The wrong one can cause huge delay and costs.
Good luck.

 

[Danzz]

There is an old and funny Jerry Reed song: "She got the goldmine and I got the shaft."
But seriously your divorce sounds pretty simple. You'll probably end up giving more than you think you should and she'll end up getting less than she thinks she should get. It is just the way it works but anything is better than staying in a bad marriage. Good luck to both of you
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyqe8n-pbqQ

 

[Kitaman]

There is an old and funny Jerry Reed song: "She got the goldmine and I got the shaft."
But seriously your divorce sounds pretty simple. You'll probably end up giving more than you think you should and she'll end up getting less than she thinks she should get. It is just the way it works but anything is better than staying in a bad marriage. Good luck to both of you
www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyqe8n-pbqQ

 

[OkaForPrez]

Thank you guys. If not for the advice, the laugh.

 

[cjd05002]

I am a divorce attorney in Fairfield County. If I represented you, I would take the position that it is a short term walk away marriage. You keep what is yours and she keeps her stuff. No alimony either year. If you have to pay her a nominal amount to get it over-with and done that may be worth it.

 

[TasteofUConn]

Even as a lawyer I have to point out that it creeps me out how many lawyers frequent the BY.

 

[OkaForPrez]

Even as a lawyer I have to point out that it creeps me out how many lawyers frequent the BY.

Lots of demand for criminal defense attorneys.

 

[huskiesnyc]

No legal advice here but sounds like you both aren't ten toes in so better off in the long run. Good luck Oka.

 

[UCweCONN]

I got divorced last year and ended up using a mediator. I agreed to let my wife keep $500k house (paid off) with me getting $80k when the house is sold when the kids are grown. I kept all of my retirement. I earn six figured and three times what my ex does. The asset distribution ended being 50/50 but I also have to pay $27k per year in child/general support plus a larger share of daycare and medical bills. I also have a mortgage now and little cash. It seemed like a fair deal at the time but now I have shizz...... My advise? Get the toughest lawyer you can and fight for yours.

 

[Krugs17]

Question for this thread- are they entitled to the assets you had before the marriage or only the assets you obtained after marriage?

Ex: if I have 50k savings then get married and save another 50k, is she entitled to say half of the 100k or the 50k that was saved once married?

 

[UCweCONN]

Question for this thread- are they entitled to the assets you had before the marriage or only the assets you obtained after marriage?

Ex: if I have 50k savings then get married and save another 50k, is she entitled to say half of the 100k or the 50k that was saved once married?

I didn't have that problem because I had nothing before. I'm not a lawyer, but based on what I learned in my divorce, it's an equal distribution of marital assets. I think when you got married your ass-ets become hers.....

 

[mauconnfan]

Best of luck OkaFor.

If you need to know where to go to find companionship I may have some idea's!

 

[UCweCONN]

Best of luck OkaFor.

If you need to know where to go to find companionship I may have some idea's!

Bangkok??

 

[intlzncster]

"If something shifts rapidly..."

Not sure if I would have liked this were I Okafor.

 

[TasteofUConn]

Question for this thread- are they entitled to the assets you had before the marriage or only the assets you obtained after marriage?

Not in my state. "Marital Assets" are usually well defined by statute. In my state, it's what was earned during the marriage, including retirement savings, but excluding inheritance and gift. Keep in mind that appreciation during the marriage is probably marital property. That is, if you bought stock for X$ just before the wedding and it's worth 4X$ on the day of divorce, then 3X$ is likely marital property. Further, the date of separation is the date that applies (in my state) in determining when newly acquired property stops being marital property.

 

[RipCity]

Sorry to hear about your situation.

If you do end up in a tough financial spot, however, this thread will make you a rich man in no time: http://the-boneyard.com/threads/ot-investing-in-silver.77203/