Win and people will go to UConn football games.
Go 3-9 and no amount of bread and circus is gonna make a blessed bit of difference.
My six-point plan for success:
1) Win the right way. If that fails, cheat. We just have to win. I don't care anymore.
2) Free buses for the students! Plenty of buses to the game! Feed the little f---ers before the game, feed them after the game. If there is anything that attracts a student, it's free food. (Save some money by buying the lowest grade of burger meat that you can legally feed to another human being.)
3) Now that you have the students there, hold them hostage. The first student that stands to leave in the third quarter gets shot through with an arrow. If so much as one bus tries to leave the stadium before the final horn, fire the driver, strip him naked and let him find his way home that way.
4) Foil those who try to leave early to avoid traffic by creating traffic jams during halftime. Close roads randomly. Release chickens on 84. Cut the power to traffic lights - be creative, play jazz out there.
5) Give people something free. People love free crap. Tee shirt, bobblehead, umbrella, whatever. Give it out to every person who walks through those turnstiles...right up until the second the game kicks off. If you still have leftover stuff, burn it before giving it to someone who was outside the building at kickoff - teach these f---ers to get to their seats on time.
6) Treat people like grownups and open the lots six hours before the game and keep them open for a reasonable period after the game. These are social events.