Buying your parents/in-laws’ house

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

Does anyone have experience with this? Does it get messy? Is it smoother? Worth the closing cost savings?

My wife and I are looking to upsize while her parents are downsizing. Their house ticks all of our boxes and our jokes about moving in have become more serious.

They impulsively bought a condo in Ft Myers in January (completely screwing us on childcare but that’s a thread for another day).

While in FL they realized they enjoyed having a small living space and hated worrying about their pipes/driveway/sidewalks etc during CT winters.

I think it’s a good idea/great house and saves the battle we're sure to have in this crazy sellers market trying to get something.

My wife is not super into the ideal of moving into “the house she grew up in” but truth be told it’s been remodeled 3 times since she moved out and it’s an entirely different house.

Thoughts?

 

[HuskyHawk]

Yes, now they do. My argument was that before the pandemic, people were looking for smaller homes and ways to spend less on home/rents. That would then cause the traditional suburban home to be worth less...simple supply/demand. The pandemic has upended my prediction - who knows for how long. Maybe forever.

I think that was a myth really. There was a little of that, because the largest generation in history hit retirement age. But the surveys showed there was no actual shift of people of child bearing age into urban centers, they still preferred the suburbs. Also, while the pandemic sped up WFH, it was already happening across many industries. We had been tracking that trend. 5G is going to bring fast internet to more rural areas.

I think it's pretty much permanent at this point. People will go to offices, but not full time. People will go to the movies again, but they will want big houses with big TV/home theater setups. Outdoor living space has been a premium consideration and the pandemic showed why. Then you can add carbon footprint considerations. If a train beats a car, staying home beats the train by even more, especially with a big drop in business travel.

 

[Dogdeacon]

I think that was a myth really. There was a little of that, because the largest generation in history hit retirement age. But the surveys showed there was no actual shift of people of child bearing age into urban centers, they still preferred the suburbs. Also, while the pandemic sped up WFH, it was already happening across many industries. We had been tracking that trend. 5G is going to bring fast internet to more rural areas.

I think it's pretty much permanent at this point. People will go to offices, but not full time. People will go to the movies again, but they will want big houses with big TV/home theater setups. Outdoor living space has been a premium consideration and the pandemic showed why. Then you can add carbon footprint considerations. If a train beats a car, staying home beats the train by even more, especially with a big drop in business travel.

I agree, I'm 45-1hr from major city and middle class trends during pandemic are:
1. Demand > supply for suburban homes
2. Home improvements, so many anecdotally in neighborhood & town, most expanding space, offices, bigger family rooms etc
3. Used cars, more cars registered, people are NOT planning on commuting any time soon & when they do en masse traffic will be horrendous creating more WFH
4. Premium on vacation homes

I think at some point people will return to the dense areas, but it'll be similar to before with premium on live work play amenities all in close proximity and catering to demographics on young & old ends of spectrum. Families with children will prefer suburbs open spaces, bigger homes more than ever.

 

[superjohn]

I think that was a myth really. There was a little of that, because the largest generation in history hit retirement age. But the surveys showed there was no actual shift of people of child bearing age into urban centers, they still preferred the suburbs. Also, while the pandemic sped up WFH, it was already happening across many industries. We had been tracking that trend. 5G is going to bring fast internet to more rural areas.

I think it's pretty much permanent at this point. People will go to offices, but not full time. People will go to the movies again, but they will want big houses with big TV/home theater setups. Outdoor living space has been a premium consideration and the pandemic showed why. Then you can add carbon footprint considerations. If a train beats a car, staying home beats the train by even more, especially with a big drop in business travel.

Your first paragraph just isn't accurate before the pandemic, not even sure it's accurate during the pandemic.

 

[Da_Aisijimo_Gou]

People believe what supports their preconceived notions or what sounds like something they like to hear and want to believe.

Hah, never happens on the 'yard

 

[HuskyHawk]

Your first paragraph just isn't accurate before the pandemic, not even sure it's accurate during the pandemic.

This research paper is from 2018. The whole "we're all going to live in dense housing and use shared resources" was never reality, even if the Brookings institute wanted it to be. Demographic and economic trends in urban, suburban and rural communities | Pew Research Center

But we've waded off topic. @Dream Jobbed 2.0 will need to let us know the ultimate decision on this house in the suburbs.

 

[superjohn]

This research paper is from 2018. The whole "we're all going to live in dense housing and use shared resources" was never reality, even if the Brookings institute wanted it to be. Demographic and economic trends in urban, suburban and rural communities | Pew Research Center

But we've waded off topic. @Dream Jobbed 2.0 will need to let us know the ultimate decision on this house in the suburbs.

Youth movement: A generational shift in preference for urbanism | City Observatory

Youth movement: A generational shift in preference for urbanism – City Observatory

cityobservatory.org

Young People’s Love of Cities Isn’t a Passing Fad

U.S. Millennials Really Do Prefer Cities

New research suggests that younger Americans’ preference for urban living is real and not wearing off.

www.bloomberg.com

 

[Improviser]

I think that was a myth really. There was a little of that, because the largest generation in history hit retirement age. But the surveys showed there was no actual shift of people of child bearing age into urban centers, they still preferred the suburbs. Also, while the pandemic sped up WFH, it was already happening across many industries. We had been tracking that trend. 5G is going to bring fast internet to more rural areas.

I think it's pretty much permanent at this point. People will go to offices, but not full time. People will go to the movies again, but they will want big houses with big TV/home theater setups. Outdoor living space has been a premium consideration and the pandemic showed why. Then you can add carbon footprint considerations. If a train beats a car, staying home beats the train by even more, especially with a big drop in business travel.

Yes, staying home beats the train unless the worker wants and needs to get out of the house for a "stress break" provided by the commute.

Interesting point on the TV/home theater. I do not have a formal home theater setup, but when sitting on my exercise bike yesterday and viewing scenery on the Roku in front of me by clicking onto Youtube, I saw a walking tour of Grand Canyon and was it picturesque! It felt like I was walking along, and the vistas were awesome. No need to try it and aggravate my plantar fasciitis. I don't think a Roku is considered home theater, unless it is so considered to be.

Usually, when I exercise, I look at the biking tours of the Lago region in Italy with the lake and mountains in the background. In my mind, it is as if I am actually there.

On your point of the pandemic highlighting the advantages of outdoor living, I really came to appreciate my backyard as a source of walking and kicking around a kickball from one end of the yard to another. Endless possibilities for a family if they have a soccer or lacrosse net.

Hope that house works out nice for @Dream Jobbed 2.0.

 

[Dogdeacon]

Youth movement: A generational shift in preference for urbanism | City Observatory

Youth movement: A generational shift in preference for urbanism – City Observatory

cityobservatory.org

Young People’s Love of Cities Isn’t a Passing Fad

U.S. Millennials Really Do Prefer Cities

New research suggests that younger Americans’ preference for urban living is real and not wearing off.

www.bloomberg.com

I think you guys are arguing past each other.
A. Cities are still desirable especially for young people
B. Suburbs are still desirable, especially for young people with REALLY young new people
HHawk was saying the death of suburbs was oversold and that EVERYone will live in cities was a myth. He did make a mistake by asserting 'people of child bearing age' aren't shifting to cities - they are (esp mid20's to early 30s), but once these become people WITH children they mostly move out of cities & are replaced.
SuperJ saying the death of cities (which HH didn't argue) is a myth.
Truth is both still popular for different reasons as always.

 

[HuskyHawk]

Yes, staying home beats the train unless the worker wants and needs to get out of the house for a "stress break" provided by the commute.

Interesting point on the TV/home theater. I do not have a formal home theater setup, but when sitting on my exercise bike yesterday and viewing scenery on the Roku in front of me by clicking onto Youtube, I saw a walking tour of Grand Canyon and was it picturesque! It felt like I was walking along, and the vistas were awesome. No need to try it and aggravate my plantar fasciitis. I don't think a Roku is considered home theater, unless it is so considered to be.

Usually, when I exercise, I look at the biking tours of the Lago region in Italy with the lake and mountains in the background. In my mind, it is as if I am actually there.

On your point of the pandemic highlighting the advantages of outdoor living, I really came to appreciate my backyard as a source of walking and kicking around a kickball from one end of the yard to another. Endless possibilities for a family if they have a soccer or lacrosse net.

Hope that house works out nice for @Dream Jobbed 2.0.

I may need a new exercise program soon. I have been watching River Monsters on Amazon but I'm in the last season. I always found the show entertaining. It also features some exotic locations, along with a story that is so easy to follow that I don't need to actually focus on it. I'm thinking I could rewatch all the Rick Steeves travel shows perhaps.

 

[XLCenterFan]

Concerning what is being debated, since I believe one of my comments set it off. I can attest that most younger people do not want to live in the "typical suburban home and neighborhood," but most end up there eventually because of the limited options for anything else. Take me. I am 38. I bought my first home in August. Technically I am a millennial (one of the first years of that generation). Besides the fact that it took awhile to save a down payment, I could care less about homeownership...would have been content renting forever. We bought because my wife was in love with the idea.

When looking for a home to buy, we realized how mismatched the housing stock in CT suburbs is for what people (us) actually want, especially young folks. I have friends who said the same. Younger people could care less about the "white picket fence American Dream." They would forgo a typical suburban home to have more money to spend and travel (or just pay debt/cost of living). As Boomers look to sell their homes, no one wants them. People are having fewer kids. People bounce around jobs. People have more college debt. I have 2 younger brothers and neither own a home. They prefer the ability to up and move, and they harp on the fact that homeownership, as presently available, takes up too much time, money and resources - large mortgage, lawn, taxes, and everything else that comes along with it. Many of my friends as well (aged 35-40) either don't own, or if they do, they own a home they aren't in love with and constantly mentioned how CT suburban/exurban homes are simply too large. There is a big gap between what people want and what is available, and people end up just buying something - not something they really like or love.

New neighborhoods need to accommodate what people are growing to want. Walkability. Close stores and parks. Less maintenance. Less square feet. Affordability. This is what real estate was moving towards, however, the pandemic has really changed some of this. If I'm a 38 year old saying this, I can only imagine what 28 year olds are saying - but I don't know too many. Young people don't want to overspend on a place to sleep and eat. I would rather golf, beach, and travel more. Not mow a lawn, rake leaves, or do housework more. Or, worse yet - work as much as possible just to be able to afford to mow, rake, and sleep.

 

[HuskyHawk]

Concerning what is being debated, since I believe one of my comments set it off. I can attest that most younger people do not want to live in the "typical suburban home and neighborhood," but most end up there eventually because of the limited options for anything else. Take me. I am 38. I bought my first home in August. Technically I am a millennial (one of the first years of that generation). Besides the fact that it took awhile to save a down payment, I could care less about homeownership...would have been content renting forever. We bought because my wife was in love with the idea.

When looking for a home to buy, we realized how mismatched the housing stock in CT suburbs is for what people (us) actually want, especially young folks. I have friends who said the same. Younger people could care less about the "white picket fence American Dream." They would forgo a typical suburban home to have more money to spend and travel (or just pay debt/cost of living). As Boomers look to sell their homes, no one wants them. People are having fewer kids. People bounce around jobs. People have more college debt. I have 2 younger brothers and neither own a home. They prefer the ability to up and move, and they harp on the fact that homeownership, as presently available, takes up too much time, money and resources - large mortgage, lawn, taxes, and everything else that comes along with it. Many of my friends as well (aged 35-40) either don't own, or if they do, they own a home they aren't in love with and constantly mentioned how CT suburban/exurban homes are simply too large. There is a big gap between what people want and what is available, and people end up just buying something - not something they really like or love.

New neighborhoods need to accommodate what people are growing to want. Walkability. Close stores and parks. Less maintenance. Less square feet. Affordability. This is what real estate was moving towards, however, the pandemic has really changed some of this. If I'm a 38 year old saying this, I can only imagine what 28 year olds are saying - but I don't know too many. Young people don't want to overspend on a place to sleep and eat. I would rather golf, beach, and travel more. Not mow a lawn, rake leaves, or do housework more. Or, worse yet - work as much as possible just to be able to afford to mow, rake, and sleep.

Yeah, @superjohn and I used to argue this in the cesspool. It's way more complex than all of us make it, with significant regional variation as well. What you describe is the way it was for me when I was younger, and for my parents before me, who lived in Chicago just before I arrived in the mid 60's. It's not really new.

People do like the walkable downtown, and I expect that what is hot and will stay hot are those small cities and bigger suburbs that offer the best of both worlds. A single family house with a place to park your car and a modest yard with a deck or patio, plus walkability to some shops, restaurants and bars. The new challenge post Covid is how do we revitalize downtowns in those suburban communities. I grew up in Manchester, and the Buckland Hills Mall killed downtown.

From what I see in real estate the current hottest thing is suburban multifamily. Those 3 story apartment complexes that they increasingly put next to a bunch of chain restaurants, bars, a movie theater, a gym and shops. Even in New England I'm seeing these pop up all over the place. They were always common in TX, FL, GA and other places with more recent population growth. Take a look at Bell Works. It's a cool concept.

 

[huskypantz]

Envious. $500K gets you a McShack here in Fairfield county.

Yeah same here just south of Boston, and my town's not especially special.

 

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

Update: we’re doing it

 

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up not having to make multiple bids and offers with just how crazy this seller’s market is. Not to mention we probably would have ended up living with them for an extended period anyways.
We are putting our house we bought for $180 just 4.5 years ago for $230 and our realtor thinks that we can get offers up to $250.
Having a possibility of over $100k equity on this house already is mind blowing.

 

[Austin316]

It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up not having to make multiple bids and offers with just how crazy this seller’s market is. Not to mention we probably would have ended up living with them for an extended period anyways.
We are putting our house we bought for $180 just 4.5 years ago for $230 and our realtor thinks that we can get offers up to $250.
Having a possibility of over $100k equity on this house already is mind blowing.

Good for you! We are in a similar boat. I’m sure you and the wife are relieved coming to a decision. Best of luck!!

 

[the Q]

It was just too good of an opportunity to pass up not having to make multiple bids and offers with just how crazy this seller’s market is. Not to mention we probably would have ended up living with them for an extended period anyways.
We are putting our house we bought for $180 just 4.5 years ago for $230 and our realtor thinks that we can get offers up to $250.
Having a possibility of over $100k equity on this house already is mind blowing.

That’s awesome bro!

I wish I could do the same with parents house except for 2 problems:

1) it’s way too much house/yard (and I loathe yard work), but especially the steep hill that can’t be mowed by ride on.

And

2) I just don’t like the town they chose and I went to hs at lol

 

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

Closing tomorrow! Still love looking at what pops on Zillow/trulia though. Saw this absolute disaster in Coventry

 

[Dogdeacon]

Best of luck! Hopefully you get the big raise this summer, spend it on improvements, flip the house a few years down the road more than doubling your equity and engendering lifelong bitterness from the crackpot sister in law (kidding)

 

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

Best of luck! Hopefully you get the big raise this summer, spend it on improvements, flip the house a few years down the road more than doubling your equity and engendering lifelong bitterness from the crackpot sister in law (kidding)

Thanks dog

 

[auror]

Considering how insane the market got, this was a great decision.