Buying your parents/in-laws’ house

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

Does anyone have experience with this? Does it get messy? Is it smoother? Worth the closing cost savings?

My wife and I are looking to upsize while her parents are downsizing. Their house ticks all of our boxes and our jokes about moving in have become more serious.

They impulsively bought a condo in Ft Myers in January (completely screwing us on childcare but that’s a thread for another day).

While in FL they realized they enjoyed having a small living space and hated worrying about their pipes/driveway/sidewalks etc during CT winters.

I think it’s a good idea/great house and saves the battle we're sure to have in this crazy sellers market trying to get something.

My wife is not super into the ideal of moving into “the house she grew up in” but truth be told it’s been remodeled 3 times since she moved out and it’s an entirely different house.

Thoughts?

 

[Improviser]

LOL. Pretty sure part of that yard is in West Hartford. That's not the "real" Hartford.

Probably that is the only real good area in Hartford, except maybe the streets in the area off Fern Street near the UConn law school. Maybe there are some luxury condos downtown Hartford, but I am not sure.

Many moons ago when I went to Law School, I lived on Owen Street in Hartford. Anyone know how that area is now?

 

[husky8273]

61 Scarborough St.

listed for $875,000. last sold in 2013 for $660,000.

 

[HooperScooper]

Envious. $500K gets you a McShack here in Fairfield county.

Same up here in the Boston area. I guess I need to move back to CT.

 

[XLCenterFan]

Probably that is the only real good area in Hartford, except maybe the streets in the area off Fern Street near the UConn law school. Maybe there are some luxury condos downtown Hartford, but I am not sure.

Many moons ago when I went to Law School, I lived on Owen Street in Hartford. Anyone know how that area is now?

We looked at houses near Elizabeth Park in the West End. North Beacon, Oxford, Kenyon, and Whitney Streets. I absolutely love that area. The houses and streets have so much character and it's close to both W. Hartford and downtown and is a diverse area. Ended up staying in the town we grew up in (Wethersfield) because both of our parents still live here and we have other work/social connections in town.

Owens Street is Clemens Place, right? My uncle once lived in a Clemens Place apt. right on Farmington. Then he moved into the top of one of Park Place Towers, which was real cool. I like the area (Owens). Love the Half Door!

 

[Improviser]

We looked at houses near Elizabeth Park in the West End. North Beacon, Oxford, Kenyon, and Whitney Streets. I absolutely love that area. The houses and streets have so much character and it's close to both W. Hartford and downtown and is a diverse area. Ended up staying in the town we grew up in (Wethersfield) because both of our parents still live here and we have other work/social connections in town.

Owens Street is Clemens Place, right? My uncle once lived in a Clemens Place apt. right on Farmington. Then he moved into the top of one of Park Place Towers, which was real cool. I like the area (Owens). Love the Half Door!

I looked up Owen Street, and apparently, Clemens Place Apartments is on that street. But, I did not live in those apartments, but in a 3 floor walkup on Owen Street near Farmington Avenue. That area was near Girard Street, Hartford High and the Mark Twain House.

Have not been in that area in years.

 

[Dream Jobbed 2.0]

For those wondering, the house is in South Windsor. The in-laws want to get an apartment in Ellington for 3/4 the year. We’re selling our house in Manchester (hopefully making $$$$).

The feral sister lives in Bloomfield and has repeatedly boasted how they want to live there forever so their kids can experience diversity. That would seem to eliminate them from wanting to live in SW.

Our budget is ~$350 but could go up to ~$400. Houses like this one our going for ~$430. I could be doubling my salary this summer too.

Also for those wondering, I serviced and kept the Subaru.

 

[Improviser]

For those wondering, the house is in South Windsor. The in-laws want to get an apartment in Ellington for 3/4 the year. We’re selling our house in Manchester (hopefully making $$$$).

The feral sister lives in Bloomfield and has repeatedly boasted how they want to live there forever so their kids can experience diversity. That would seem to eliminate them from wanting to live in SW.

Our budget is ~$350 but could go up to ~$400. Houses like this one our going for ~$430. I could be doubling my salary this summer too.

Also for those wondering, I serviced and kept the Subaru.

Great car! I love mine. Good ride and handling and I like the folddown back seats when I take a trip, which I have not done since Covid.

 

[8893]

For those wondering, the house is in South Windsor. The in-laws want to get an apartment in Ellington for 3/4 the year. We’re selling our house in Manchester (hopefully making $$$$).

The feral sister lives in Bloomfield and has repeatedly boasted how they want to live there forever so their kids can experience diversity. That would seem to eliminate them from wanting to live in SW.

Our budget is ~$350 but could go up to ~$400. Houses like this one our going for ~$430. I could be doubling my salary this summer too.

Also for those wondering, I serviced and kept the Subaru.

Sounds like the only hurdle then is whether your wife can be happy there in spite of her reservations.

If you are pretty sure the sister obstacles have been eliminated, maybe you should have her run it by them in advance just to get their blessing and make sure it doesn‘t come as a surprise. If you involve them in the process they are less likely to hold any grudges about it.

 

[uconnfan68]

listed for $875,000. last sold in 2013 for $660,000.

Just tweaking deepster. ;^)

 

[superjohn]

Small hi jack of the thread. Would you buy a beautiful 750k house for 350k (your max budgeted limit) but it’s only that low because there was a bloody murder and suicide in it a year prior?

My brother once moved into an apartment where there was a deck collapse that killed a dozen people, all it means is you have a sturdy deck now.

 

[the Q]

For those wondering, the house is in South Windsor. The in-laws want to get an apartment in Ellington for 3/4 the year. We’re selling our house in Manchester (hopefully making $$$$).

The feral sister lives in Bloomfield and has repeatedly boasted how they want to live there forever so their kids can experience diversity. That would seem to eliminate them from wanting to live in SW.

Our budget is ~$350 but could go up to ~$400. Houses like this one our going for ~$430. I could be doubling my salary this summer too.

Also for those wondering, I serviced and kept the Subaru.

Financially, I’ve you. This is just doing all the right things.

Just make sure your wife is cool with it and you should be good to go.

 

[nomar]

Envious. $500K gets you a McShack here in Fairfield county.

$500k gets you a McStudio here in NYC!

 

[nomar]

My brother once moved into an apartment where there was a deck collapse that killed a dozen people, all it means is you have a sturdy deck now.

Chicago, right?

 

[Deepster]

My brother once moved into an apartment where there was a deck collapse that killed a dozen people, all it means is you have a sturdy deck now.

Is that a little different? An accident versus a murder/suicide? I don’t know. To me I’d buy both.

 

[Improviser]

Is that a little different? An accident versus a murder/suicide? I don’t know. To me I’d buy both.

If I knew there was a deck collapse, I would want an inspection before buying, unless one was already done, and certified by the town. Even then, I might not trust the competence of the town's inspector, and would still get one.

On the murder-suicide, the murderer is dead, so I would not be deterred except maybe if I thought it could later be a deterrent for a buyer. If I contemplated living there for 5,10, or more years, I would not worry about it.

 

[BigErnMcCracken]

$500k gets you a McStudio here in NYC!

If you like sunshine and want a yard I can put you in this gem out here.

2004 N Short Ave, Compton, CA 90221 - 2 beds/1 bath

(CRMLS) 2 beds, 1 bath, 696 sq. ft. house located at 2004 N Short Ave, Compton, CA 90221 sold for $456,000 on May 11, 2021. MLS# DW21037325. Property has 2 bedrooms / 1 bath (title shows 3 bedrooms / 1 bat...

www.redfin.com

 

[Watchdog]

Also need to consider the ancillary effects on the rest or the family dynamic. Wife is youngest of 3 girls. Middle sister already has her forever house (half a million dollar McMansion In Tolland). They’re best friends. Would be happy for us.

Older sister is a complete loose cannon. We avoid her/ her husband and feral children at all costs. They’re still in their “starter” home and I could foresee huge issues from them. They don’t outwardly have any interest in the house but I could see them coming out of the woodworks. Especially my brother in law. He is constantly seeking my wife’s parent’s approval while being a total ass to the rest of the family. Will say we’re using them and cutting them out of $10,000s of dollars.

It would be easy to say don't worry about the sister you don't like and her husband, but that can come back to haunt you. Be open and get things in writing or at some point in the future there could be family and legal problems.

My parternal grandmother handled something similar many years ago. She had three kids and when she decided to divest herself of the family farm she wanted each of her kids to receive a third of the value but didn't want to split it into three parcels and complicate the whole process.

Her solution was to first establish a value for the land and then ask my Dad to pay 1/3 of the value to my aunt and 1/3 to my uncle and my Dad would get his 1/3 for "free".

All was good until about 25 years later when my Dad received an unsolicited offer for the land and my uncle sued him to get some of that money even though he was fairly compensated and my Dad had paid taxes on the land and maintained it all those years on his own. My Dad won the case but it cost him and my uncle unnecessary legal fees.

The irony was my Dad had been working with his attorney on how best to share some of the proceeds with his brother and sister but after the suit my uncle got nothing.

 

[superjohn]

Chicago, right?

Yes.

 

[Watchdog]

If you like sunshine and want a yard I can put you in this gem out here.

2004 N Short Ave, Compton, CA 90221 - 2 beds/1 bath

(CRMLS) 2 beds, 1 bath, 696 sq. ft. house located at 2004 N Short Ave, Compton, CA 90221 sold for $456,000 on May 11, 2021. MLS# DW21037325. Property has 2 bedrooms / 1 bath (title shows 3 bedrooms / 1 bat...

www.redfin.com

Wow, only $696 per square foot in sunny SoCal? Move right in too............

 

[Kolumbo]

Houses won't be the great investments they used to be. Here's an option.

A woman built a tiny house village after moving into a 204-square foot home post-divorce to save for retirement (msn.com)

 

[Dogdeacon]

I say absolutely no, don't buy your wife's 'grew up there' home. The sibling rivalry bs from the tough family makes it iffy. But more importantly I think when people return to their same hometown and house, there is reason to regress and fall back into what one was like then, even if there is no trauma there is simply a tendency to act more like a child.
And you and your wife are trying to start a new family, blending in experiences from both your pasts. Trying to do so in her old house will suddenly make her family's traditions, habits and customs much more important.

Bottom line its hard enough to be married, yes finances can complicate greatly but if you have a partnership you can work that out. This is throwing her entire family & childhood into the marriage pot and stirring, unnecessary.

 

[HuskyFich]

If anyone wants to sell their house to me and would consider doing it on terms (I'll pay you a fixed $ monthly with interest over time), DM me.

(LOL, might as well try)

 

[XLCenterFan]

Houses won't be the great investments they used to be. Here's an option.

A woman built a tiny house village after moving into a 204-square foot home post-divorce to save for retirement (msn.com)

I had been saying this for years and then corona came. My opinion was that all suburban and exurban neighborhoods/areas are simply full of homes that are far too big, an on lots too big, for what the majority of people will want or be able to afford in the future. The idea that you need half an acre, or a 3,000 square foot home, doesn't mesh with what trends are forecasting that people want (again, pre-pandemic), myself included. I had predicted that suburban homes would decrease in value, especially at the higher end (larger homes), over time. I had considered shorting the homebuilders index, or stocks like Toll Brothers, or even lumber indexes. Glad I didn't, because corona happened, and there was a deluge of urban residents fleeing cities for homes and areas similar to what I just mentioned. I still think society is moving towards much smaller homes and places to live, it's just been greatly disrupted by the pandemic, and homes have actually increased in value, and may continue to do so for years to come.

 

[the Q]

I had been saying this for years and then corona came. My opinion was that all suburban and exurban neighborhoods/areas are simply full of homes that are far too big, an on lots too big, for what the majority of people will want or be able to afford in the future. The idea that you need half an acre, or a 3,000 square foot home, doesn't mesh with what trends are forecasting that people want, myself included. I had predicted that suburban homes would decrease in value, especially at the higher end (larger homes), over time. I had considered shorting the homebuilders index, or stocks like Toll Brothers, or even lumber indexes. Glad I didn't, because corona happened, and there was a deluge of urban residents fleeing cities for homes and areas similar to what I just mentioned. I still think society is moving towards much smaller homes and places to live, it's just been greatly disrupted by the pandemic, and homes have actually increased in value, and may continue to do so for years to come.

Honestly I’d be looking at my parents house except for 2 factors:

1) it’s in the crumbling foundation zone; and

2) the yard is just too damn big (and on a brutal hill which cannot use a riding mower) that I have no interest in handling

 

[NJHusky]

I had been saying this for years and then corona came. My opinion was that all suburban and exurban neighborhoods/areas are simply full of homes that are far too big, an on lots too big, for what the majority of people will want or be able to afford in the future. The idea that you need half an acre, or a 3,000 square foot home, doesn't mesh with what trends are forecasting that people want, myself included. I had predicted that suburban homes would decrease in value, especially at the higher end (larger homes), over time. I had considered shorting the homebuilders index, or stocks like Toll Brothers, or even lumber indexes. Glad I didn't, because corona happened, and there was a deluge of urban residents fleeing cities for homes and areas similar to what I just mentioned. I still think society is moving towards much smaller homes and places to live, it's just been greatly disrupted by the pandemic, and homes have actually increased in value, and may continue to do so for years to come.

The NYC refugees that looked at our house in NJ seemed to want space....and a pool. My kitchen is not huge and there were some comments about that ...even though the kitchen is prob the size of some NYC studios. Lol