Adubs European "vacation"

[ClifSpliffy]

i'm pretty sure that big wedding parties are just a plot by the brides union to try and get all their single gal pals hitched up, and have some guy pay for it all.
they make movies aboot that.

 

[storrsroars]

Weddings are such a waste of $$ and I’ve found the more over the top and ridiculous the wedding is the less likely the marriage is to last.

My wife has been fuming that we didn't get an invite to our next door neighbor's daughter's wedding, particularly after learning that $30K was spent on flowers, resulting in culling the invite list (the neighbors across the street were invited).

I didn't care. Saved me a dry cleaning bill and a $100 gift.

 

[NEforceUConn]

Jonesing a bit for wedding blues. Time for an Ativan

 

[8893]

Jonesing a bit for wedding blues. Time for an Ativan

Here ya go:

 

[ctchamps]

So the next day in Edinburgh was the wedding rehearsal and wedding rehearsal dinner . Because a contest was going on between parents of bride, who simply rented the castle the bride wanted to get married in, not competing, but the grooms parents decided to rent out and shut down the national museum of Scotland on a Saturday in Dick swinging response rehearse a wedding that was 20 miles away the next day, , and instead of a rehearsal dinner for the small wedding party they invited all 93 attendees of the wedding to this rehearsal reception

The bride is very self centered ( as already evidenced) and also had hired an Edinburgh wedding planner for huge money. Who it turns out is absolutely useless. The bride wanted to have gift bags with local trinkets for all the attendees at rehearsal. Did she do it? How about her ridiculously overpriced wedding coordinator? What was the the plan?

There wasn’t one. It last minute ended up being Adub and the step- father get to this pointless reception schlepping 90 bags worth of crap 2 hours earlier than scheduled in an Uber and then putting every bag together and tying a name to it. And then the bride got there and complained about it!

Also , the deal went from 7 pm to 10 ( 5 pm for me) and they had a full open bar with top shelf stuff which was nice, but no food! Just a few amuse bouche deals. Crackers and salmon. Or whitefish. You can imagine what parents of kids were thinking. I mean it’s DINNER time!

National museum rehearsal before rest of people showed.

View attachment 77769

So Chip! You bent over and said “Thank you ma’am! May I have another?”

 

[HooperScooper]

My wife has been fuming that we didn't get an invite to our next door neighbor's daughter's wedding, particularly after learning that $30K was spent on flowers, resulting in culling the invite list (the neighbors across the street were invited).

I didn't care. Saved me a dry cleaning bill and a $100 gift.

Is that all you give for a wedding gift these days? That was the going rate when I got married 27 years ago. Cheap skate.

 

[ctchamps]

Is that all you give for a wedding gift these days? That was the going rate when I got married 27 years ago. Cheap skate.

Now we know why he didn’t make the cut.

 

[Northbound]

Now we know why he didn’t make the cut.

If you're an adult who is getting married/second marriage you shouldn't expect bupkis as it relates to money gifts - i had a friend who's got plenty of coin (partner in firm, multiple houses, etc.) and got remarried at like 48 and I think they expected cash gifts - we got them something a bit more personal, if they didn't like it tough nuts, they can pound sand.

I have no idea what the current rate for a young persons wedding would be 100-200 a head?

 

[HooperScooper]

If you're an adult who is getting married/second marriage you shouldn't expect bupkis as it relates to money gifts - i had a friend who's got plenty of coin (partner in firm, multiple houses, etc.) and got remarried at like 48 and I think they expected cash gifts - we got them something a bit more personal, if they didn't like it tough nuts, they can pound sand.

I have no idea what the current rate for a young persons wedding would be 100-200 a head?

Yeah I think that's a decent range and depends on your relationship to the people getting married.

 

[storrsroars]

Is that all you give for a wedding gift these days? That was the going rate when I got married 27 years ago. Cheap skate.

This is Pittsburgh, not where all you rich guys live.

And trust me, $100 would be above the median and mean here. Not to mention actually wearing a suit to the thing, lol.

 

[DaveHuskiesFan]

Yeah I think that's a decent range and depends on your relationship to the people getting married.

We just got married, I'm 31, my wife is 27. Had a small 70 person wedding. One couple gave $200, the rest gave $250+ and of those most were $300 a couple.

 

[WestHartHusk]

I'm still on the baggage. How do you have staff to load it onto a truck and shipping it to a warehouse versus moving it 100 feet to the conveyor belts?

 

[NEforceUConn]

I'm still on the baggage. How do you have staff to load it onto a truck and shipping it to a warehouse versus moving it 100 feet to the conveyor belts?

British labor union rules

 

[Chin Diesel]

Should be a sliding scale based on how well you know the person and or family getting married. Also agree if it's second marriage or more or if it's two adults (40+ years old) cash goes down.
I'd go with $100-$300 range.

 

[Chin Diesel]

I'm still on the baggage. How do you have staff to load it onto a truck and shipping it to a warehouse versus moving it 100 feet to the conveyor belts?

British labor union rules

A few years ago I was in England for work and we got a nice reminder to stop it when we started moving conference room tables and chairs around. There was an employee whose job it was to arrange the room and account for every table and chair. He gladly moved stuff where we wanted it moved to.

 

[husky429]

We just got married, I'm 31, my wife is 27. Had a small 70 person wedding. One couple gave $200, the rest gave $250+ and of those most were $300 a couple.

70 people is not small. I know very few people who have 70+ people at their wedding.

 

[HooperScooper]

This is Pittsburgh, not where all you rich guys live.

And trust me, $100 would be above the median and mean here. Not to mention actually wearing a suit to the thing, lol.

Note to anyone getting married: Don't do it in Pittsburgh.

 

[8893]

Should be a sliding scale based on how well you know the person and or family getting married. Also agree if it's second marriage or more or if it's two adults (40+ years old) cash goes down.
I'd go with $100-$300 range.

And it's also different if it's family; and if you have some role in the wedding (e.g., a reading). I learned this last summer after asking around a bit, as I was doing a reading for my niece/Goddaughter's wedding, and also attended the rehearsal; and two of our daughters also attended with us. So that was a pretty big nut.

The tricky part is that her brother, my nephew, is getting married this summer, and I am neither in the wedding nor am I his Godfather. And this time it's just my wife and me attending, with none of our daughters. And we have to travel for it, which means airfare and two nights in a hotel. But I can't see giving him and his wife less than I gave my niece and her husband, even if it's justifiable, because I know how people compare notes and I wouldn't want there to be any "issues." It's not worth it to me to give them a little less--although still a lot--and be considered a cheapskate uncle/brother.

As my partner preaches, sometimes it's better to overspend, as long as you know why you're doing it.

 

[husky429]

I think it's weird as hell that grown ass adults expect gifts from their family and friends for their wedding. It's a stupid tradition. I told everyone I know: NO GIFTS. Some didn't listen which was nice... but I'm certainly not expecting it. Wedding culture is an embarassment.

 

[Rocktheworld]

My son studied abroad in Australia for a semester at Macquarie University in Sydney - wasn't sure he was coming back - loved it down under. My friend's daughter got stuck there for an extra 9 months due to Covid and goes back this December to 'visit'

Lol my friend group had a girl who waited until spring of senior year to go abroad to Australia. She came back to graduate and spent about a month home but it was straight back and basically nobody has heard much from her since

Do Aussies get the same deal Canadians get where they can move and live freely between there and the UK, basically as citizens of multiple countries?

 

[storrsroars]

Note to anyone getting married: Don't do it in Pittsburgh.

Just for the record, I gave my godson and his wife $500 for their wedding in CT earlier this month. I would've gone a grand, but that was before gas went to $5 and budgeting for the hotel they chose as their base, which came to about a grand between those two things. But I also gave them another $200 in local Pgh booze

 

[NJHusky]

And it's also different if it's family; and if you have some role in the wedding (e.g., a reading). I learned this last summer after asking around a bit, as I was doing a reading for my niece/Goddaughter's wedding, and also attended the rehearsal; and two of our daughters also attended with us. So that was a pretty big nut.

The tricky part is that her brother, my nephew, is getting married this summer, and I am neither in the wedding nor am I his Godfather. And this time it's just my wife and me attending, with none of our daughters. And we have to travel for it, which means airfare and two nights in a hotel. But I can't see giving him and his wife less than I gave my niece and her husband, even if it's justifiable, because I know how people compare notes and I wouldn't want there to be any "issues." It's not worth it to me to give them a little less--although still a lot--and be considered a cheapskate uncle/brother.

As my partner preaches, sometimes it's better to overspend, as long as you know why you're doing it.

Rather than including your daughters gift in yours, you should have given them the money to gift…then u could have cut out their share easily.

 

[Mr. Wonderful]

If you're an adult who is getting married/second marriage you shouldn't expect bupkis as it relates to money gifts - i had a friend who's got plenty of coin (partner in firm, multiple houses, etc.) and got remarried at like 48 and I think they expected cash gifts - we got them something a bit more personal, if they didn't like it tough nuts, they can pound sand.

I have no idea what the current rate for a young persons wedding would be 100-200 a head?

Second marriage - you get a handshake and a congrats/good luck.

That's it. No money, no gift. If you didn't choose carefully enough the first time, that's not my problem.

 

[8893]

Rather than including your daughters gift in yours, you should have given them the money to gift…then u could have cut out their share easily.

They were not invited separately with their own invitations. It was an invitation addressed to my family.

 

[CL82]

And it's also different if it's family; and if you have some role in the wedding (e.g., a reading). I learned this last summer after asking around a bit, as I was doing a reading for my niece/Goddaughter's wedding, and also attended the rehearsal; and two of our daughters also attended with us. So that was a pretty big nut.

The tricky part is that her brother, my nephew, is getting married this summer, and I am neither in the wedding nor am I his Godfather. And this time it's just my wife and me attending, with none of our daughters. And we have to travel for it, which means airfare and two nights in a hotel. But I can't see giving him and his wife less than I gave my niece and her husband, even if it's justifiable, because I know how people compare notes and I wouldn't want there to be any "issues." It's not worth it to me to give them a little less--although still a lot--and be considered a cheapskate uncle/brother.

As my partner preaches, sometimes it's better to overspend, as long as you know why you're doing it.

Yeah, I’ve never seen the benefit of “frugality” in the situations. You short somebody $100 even $200, what does it mean in your life? Nothing. I’d rather aim high and save the potential drama. Plus, at our stage of life, especially if it’s a young couple, a few hundred dollars means a heck of a lot more to them than it does to me.

(Edit: I wasn’t shooting for the humble brag there, rather just the statement of the relative stages of life. Once you’ve been around for a while a lot of your sunk costs have been sunk, but for kids starting out there ponying up for everything. Getting a little help here and there can actually matter to them.)