OT: Visiting Campus

[UC313]

I took a tour with my daughter last month (she has taken about 30 so far). She really liked the campus and said she could see herself there (a big sigh of relief for me and my wallet), and she will be applying (she also got nominated for a nutmeg scholarship – but that is a longshot).

One thing that differentiated the Uconn tour compared to other colleges is the tour guides made an attempt to really get to know the students in the group and got to know what they were looking for in a University, then tailored to the tour based on that. During the walks between stops the guide took each prospective student and personally talked to them for a few minutes. I think that made a difference for my daughter.

Also, if you want to see some Uconn innovation, go to the barns and see the robotic milking station. When the cows know they are ready to be milked they walk into this stall and laser guided pumps attach to the udders and automatically milk the cow, the cows just naturally line up for this, it was pretty neat.

Man, when i was a student, we had to milk the cows for a nutrition class i thought was going to be a breeze. We had cows on either side separated by some steel railings. One gal decided she needed to dress to the nines for this event. I just about threw up all the beer i had the night before when she got splashed by a falling patty.

 

[8893]

Coincidentally, the best tour guide we had was at St. Michael's, who we play tonight. My daughter loved him, and he was the kind of kid you want your daughter to bring home. Turns out he was their "star" guide, on full merit scholarship and just an all-around great kid. UVM was our first college tour and the size kind of overwhelmed her, so when we did St. Mike's later that same day she was really attracted by how comfortable it felt, and this kid really put it over the top. I was thrilled when they waived our application fee, and then I was ecstatic when they offered her a ton of merit aid, admission to their honors program and all sorts of other enticements.

Of course, she soon soured on it because it was too small and too cold.

 

[Chief00]

The whole process is fascinating and awful at the same time. They pretend to want you and yet will likely turn you down. Its a bizarre game of who gets to be the Belle of which ball. Wesleyan desperately wants that kid who's borderline at Yale, will begrudgingly accept UConn's top targets and will turn it's nose up at a UConn borderline case. Do you, as a student go with that less attractive but clearly interested suitor? Or do you hold out for the gorgeous one that is less interested in you.

I am sure many of the Wesleyan guides are good. Ours was poorly coached, not dressed appropriately and couldn't answer simple questions. Campus was nice, if not at all my thing.

Tufts guy was very impressive. Fairfield had Jesuit efficiency and they were very well coached. I assume it's luck of the draw.

PC has really transformed its campus.

 

[HuskyHawk]

PC has really transformed its campus.

Yeah it’s on the list. A bit too close to home perhaps. Maybe 30 minutes at most. It will get a spring visit.

To @8893 ’s point there is value in going further, but so far she is reluctant to leave New England. I’d be happy to have her check out William and Mary, Purdue etc. My wife started at Loyola New Orleans and keeps mentioning that, but there is no way I want her in NOLA.

 

[auror]

Still need to figure out, big vs smaller, city vs suburbs vs rural. That's on top of field of study and other factors. Fairfield seemed full of LAX Bros and HS Cheerleaders and she hated it. Tufts seems really unique, Ivy smart kids who have an individualist, entrepreneurial streak. I doubt we will hit 30 tours, but we will go way past 11. Next year we start narrowing it down, with the reaches (Tufts probably, maybe BC), medium chance (UConn?) and safety schools. I think a lot depends on whether your kid has an idea of what they want or not. Mine didn't before this started. Will be interesting to see if anybody offers Merit aid, we aren't getting any other kind.

I was on that Tufts borderline, and I got a pretty nice merit grant package from BU so that's where I ended up. Private but almost as large as a public, but with decent amount of internationals paying full boat so they were pretty good with merit aid.

 

[beerfan]

I don’t know if visiting 30 schools it is the norm (I have a nephew that only went to two, and some of her friends have visited more), but I have only one kid, she is smart and has lots of opportunities ahead of her. That combined with the fact she doesn’t know what she really wants to do exposing her to the most options in probably one of the most influential decisions in her life and we are also helicopter parents.

My daughter thought she really wanted to go to Dartmouth, but they treated her like crap and it was quickly dropped from the list (even though they had the best looking preppy boys), that trip was combined with a trip to UNH which she loved and is now on the list, she was swayed by a hockey game where they threw fish on the ice after they scored.

To further on huskyhawks comments above, it is been a very eye opening and interesting process and will know over the next few months how it will all pan out. I don’t know yet but what I have been told that less attractive but clearly interested suitors (some can have very large marketing budgets) will throw lots of money to get the smart kids to go to their schools – we shall see as several are on the application list of about 12 schools.

 

[8893]

Yeah it’s on the list. A bit too close to home perhaps. Maybe 30 minutes at most. It will get a spring visit.

To @8893 ’s point there is value in going further, but so far she is reluctant to leave New England. I’d be happy to have her check out William and Mary, Purdue etc. My wife started at Loyola New Orleans and keeps mentioning that, but there is no way I want her in NOLA.

Nice thing about Baltimore and Philly is that they are both easy by train, which makes a big difference in their ability to come home, as well as for you to visit. Same for DC and even Richmond (which is a great school and cool city). That was one of things that eliminated Pittsburgh down the stretch, because it's a PITA to get to. Great city though.

 

[HuskyHawk]

I was on that Tufts borderline, and I got a pretty nice merit grant package from BU so that's where I ended up. Private but almost as large as a public, but with decent amount of internationals paying full boat so they were pretty good with merit aid.

BU is interesting. I also heard from a friend who went through this two years ago that they have a standing scholarship for Massachusetts Catholic School grads, which she will be. So BU bucks the trend in some ways, and I think knows that BC is the first choice for those kids. We are visiting BU and BC in the next couple of weeks, that that finishes our fall trips. I have always disliked BU's urban setting and lack of a traditional campus, but she may love it.

 

[UConnRock]

The elite schools and some a bit below the elite level offer little or no merit aid. The top schools are also very focused on diversity goals. That leaves a massive number of very smart kids to, for lack of a better term, filter down to the next level private, top liberal arts and top publics. There is lots of merit money being thrown around to get those top students that were not accepted at the elites.

Finding that balance between tuition/aid and prestige/reputation can be difficult. Disagreement between parents and students can get messy. students are told not to have your heart set on a favorite, but that is just not possible

 

[UConnRock]

BU is interesting. I also heard from a friend who went through this two years ago that they have a standing scholarship for Massachusetts Catholic School grads, which she will be. So BU bucks the trend in some ways, and I think knows that BC is the first choice for those kids. We are visiting BU and BC in the next couple of weeks, that that finishes our fall trips. I have always disliked BU's urban setting and lack of a traditional campus, but she may love it.

Check out Northeastern while there. Nicer campus environment than BU and in same area. We checked out BC. Thought it was nice, but little chance for merit scholarships. Son did not like that there was no guarantee that you won’t be housed on the law school campus as a freshman and have to shuttle to and from the main campus.

 

[8893]

The elite schools and some a bit below the elite level offer little or no merit aid. The top schools are also very focused on diversity goals. That leaves a massive number of very smart kids to, for lack of a better term, filter down to the next level private, top liberal arts and top publics. There is lots of merit money being thrown around to get those top students that were not accepted at the elites.

Finding that balance between tuition/aid and prestige/reputation can be difficult. Disagreement between parents and students can get messy.

This is why, after much hemming and hawing, we ultimately hired a college consultant. Especially because she really helped minimize the drama and disagreements. We all made our goals clear to her from the start and she really did a good job of helping us all meet them. Although I initially balked at the price for her services, she was more than worth it in the end (and I'm guessing she costs considerably more now). I don't think we would use her again because we learned a lot in the process, and our other daughters are different, too. But she really helped us all navigate what appeared to be a very confusing landscape to us--frequently made all the more confusing by emotional and irrational reactions by all of us, who needed to learn why those reactions were not productive.

 

[HuskyHawk]

Check out Northeastern while there. Nicer campus environment than BU and in same area. We checked out BC. Thought it was nice, but little chance for merit scholarships. Son did not like that there was no guarantee that you won’t be housed on the law school campus as a freshman and have to shuttle to and from the main campus.

Will hit Northeastern in the spring as well. It's crazy trendy right now for kids in Eastern Mass and as a result has become much harder to get into than it was. I remember when it was known for the Co-op program and not much else. Neighborhood around there kind of stinks in my opinion. But then I went to school in Storrs in the 80s.

I need to look into the merit stuff. She's not going to be elite (Ivy and little Ivy) school caliber unless she crushes her SATs. I generally hate the idea of paying full freight for a private school that is less competitive than say, UConn. I could suck it up and pay that bill for Tufts and probably BC. I'm not up to pay that for Stonehill or Quinnipiac. But if a place like Holy Cross cuts my bill down quite a bit, I can live with that. With zero chance of need based aid it's a challenge.

Edit: meant to quote the post where you said this: "Finding that balance between tuition/aid and prestige/reputation can be difficult. Disagreement between parents and students can get messy. students are told not to have your heart set on a favorite, but the is just not possible "

 

[CL82]

One thing that differentiated the Uconn tour compared to other colleges is the tour guides made an attempt to really get to know the students in the group and got to know what they were looking for in a University, then tailored to the tour based on that. During the walks between stops the guide took each prospective student and personally talked to them for a few minutes. I think that made a difference for my daughter.

Glad to hear it. My daughter's guide was a nice enough kid but a bit... nebbish and didn't seem to connect well with the group. She didn't take UConn off her list but it could have been better with a more enthusiastic guide.

 

[8893]

But if a place like Holy Cross cuts my bill down quite a bit, I can live with that.

Good luck with that. They are less likely to offer merit aid than BC.

But if she doesn't mind Worcester, Clark University is a very interesting, pretty unique school that offers a ton of merit aid. It's one of the schools featured in Colleges that Change Lives; iirc @alexd. 's daughter goes (or went?) there.

Your biggest obstacle will be that she will likely get her heart set on the same school that literally thousands of girls just like her have their hearts set on, and your biggest challenge will be trying to avoid or at least mitigate that.

 

[HuskyHawk]

Good luck with that. They are less likely to offer merit aid than BC.

But if she doesn't mind Worcester, Clark University is a very interesting, pretty unique school that offers a ton of merit aid. It's one of the schools featured in Colleges that Change Lives; iirc @alexd. 's daughter goes (or went?) there.

Your biggest obstacle will be that she will likely get her heart set on the same school that literally thousands of girls just like her have their hearts set on, and your biggest challenge will be trying to avoid or at least mitigate that.

I happen to know someone who has been on Clark’s alumni board for over 20 years. Crappy part of Worcester though. Ugh. Feels like no great options but I’m sure it will sort itself out.

Back on topic of UConn visit, did you guys have a strong sense of concern that your kid wouldn’t like UConn? Whether she goes or not, I want her to view it positively. Like it would hurt me feelings if she doesn’t.

 

[8893]

I happen to know someone who has been on Clark’s alumni board for over 20 years. Crappy part of Worcester though. Ugh. Feels like no great options but I’m sure it will sort itself out.

Back on topic of UConn visit, did you guys have a strong sense of concern that your kid wouldn’t like UConn? Whether she goes or not, I want her to view it positively. Like it would hurt me feelings if she doesn’t.

Yes, it will sort itself out. There are a ton of great options; you--read, she--just have to be open to considering ones that are not at the top of the list for all of her peers--read, competition--if you don't want to pay full freight.

As for UConn, I went into the whole process expecting her not to like it because it wasn't flashy enough. She took it for granted because she's been going there regularly for literally her whole life and she always said she wanted to leave Connecticut for college (something I fully supported). Well, whaddya know it ended up in her final two/three for a variety of reasons. We never did a proper tour before applying because we didn't make it a priority, but when she went to accepted students day there we decided that only my wife (who didn't go to UConn) would go with her, so they could both experience it without my influence. They both came back very impressed and it was in the running until the very end--with me probably being the one who talked her out of it because I didn't think it was the best match for her. So, you never know.

 

[HooperScooper]

But if she doesn't mind Worcester, Clark University is a very interesting, pretty unique school that offers a ton of merit aid. It's one of the schools featured in Colleges that Change Lives; iirc @alexd. 's daughter goes (or went?) there.

She's in her 5th year there. Bachelor's/Master's in 5 years.

It's in a really crappy area of Worcester though. Which is saying something!

 

[Pudge]

My daughter had lots of options. But Grandfather went to UCONN. I went to UCONN. 6 cousins. Lots of Blue

She seriously looked at Drexel - which is amazing story of growth & serious excellence in many ways in Philadelphia. Then a little nod to Cornell & UNH. Decision day ... she’s embraced UCONN with little cheerleading from me. And the experience & relationships were astounding - she graduated last June.

 

[HuskyHawk]

My daughter had lots of options. But Grandfather went to UCONN. I went to UCONN. 6 cousins. Lots of Blue

She seriously looked at Drexel - which is amazing story of growth & serious excellence in many ways in Philadelphia. Then a little nod to Cornell & UNH. Decision day ... she’s embraced UCONN with little cheerleading from me. And the experience & relationships were astounding - she graduated last June.

Unlike you or @8893 my daughter has never ever been to UConn. She's barely ever been in the state of CT. So I am rather curious to see what she thinks. It's both the biggest campus and most rural that she will have visited. So the potential exists for very positive or very negative views. Will find out in about 25 49 hours.

Edit: damn. Working from home today (normally do on Friday) and forgot it was only Thursday.

 

[8893]

Unlike you or @8893 my daughter has never ever been to UConn. She's barely ever been in the state of CT. So I am rather curious to see what she thinks. It's both the biggest campus and most rural that she will have visited. So the potential exists for very positive or very negative views. Will find out in about 25 hours

Dairy Bar pretty much guarantees at least some very positive views.

 

[Guapo]

Unlike you or @8893 my daughter has never ever been to UConn. She's barely ever been in the state of CT. So I am rather curious to see what she thinks. It's both the biggest campus and most rural that she will have visited. So the potential exists for very positive or very negative views. Will find out in about 25 hours

If you just do the UConn chant over and over again during the tour, in front of all her peers, I’m sure that’ll really push her towards UConn.

But seriously, as a recent-ish grad (2013) I loved my time there.

Obviously I’m a bit biased, but UConn is, like, so much better than any of those 30 some odd other dumb schools you listed

 

[Guapo]

Also, not sure if your daughter is a sports fan or not, but even if she isn’t she should know that going to a school like UConn creates a sense of community that isn’t always felt at schools like BU, Northeastern etc

 

[HuskyHawk]

Also, not sure if your daughter is a sports fan or not, but even if she isn’t she should know that going to a school like UConn creates a sense of community that isn’t always felt at schools like BU, Northeastern etc

She's not a sports fan. My fondest recollection of UConn was that sense of community. For a bigger school, you really did see a lot of the same people every day and it felt smaller than it is. Small dorm dining hall experience helped there and that is gone now (and what replaced it is much more convenient). Plus we're all somewhat isolated in Storrs, so half the students aren't out exploring Boston or whatever.

I think I'd have hated BU. Too much like school as your job.

 

[CL82]

Unlike you or @8893 my daughter has never ever been to UConn. She's barely ever been in the state of CT. So I am rather curious to see what she thinks. It's both the biggest campus and most rural that she will have visited. So the potential exists for very positive or very negative views. Will find out in about 25 hours

Lol, and now I suddenly feel like I have a rooting interest in this. I'm curious to hear what her reaction. What's the weather going to be?

it was in the running until the very end--with me probably being the one who talked her out of it because I didn't think it was the best match for her.

Why?

 

[Guapo]

She's not a sports fan. My fondest recollection of UConn was that sense of community. For a bigger school, you really did see a lot of the same people every day and it felt smaller than it is. Small dorm dining hall experience helped there and that is gone now (and what replaced it is much more convenient). Plus we're all somewhat isolated in Storrs, so half the students aren't out exploring Boston or whatever.

I think I'd have hated BU. Too much like school as your job.

Absolutely and obviously that sense of community transcends sports. It was a cool experience basically living in a city of 20k kids your own age out in the woods for 4 years.