Advice For Reversing Bad Mojo

[Askgreek]

I need the Boneyard to help advise me on how I can help reverse the bad mojo trend that I am facing today before the team meets the Cardinals in tonight's championship game. My dilemma starts with my experiences before and after the previous two matchups with the Cardinals. I am a devout Husky fan. So much so, that my wife claims I am obsessive about it. So, my point is, I watch or attend each game religiously. Now, here is my issue. I had a family event/obligation conflict during both of the first two matchups with Louisville. If, I have such conflicts, I DVR the games, and then watch them after the event or on a tape delay. These two games, were the only two that were over before I started watching them on delay, and after learning of the outcome, I decided not to watch. So, this brings us to tonight. My wife has planned a dinner and show tonight with our friends. I know I am going to miss the game in its entirety again. So, I feel obligated to seek your advice on how my actions could help reverse the outcome from the first two games. Here are some of my thoughts, keep in mind all of your suggestions are on the table: 1) don't DVR the Game, 2) force wife and friends to sit in bar at dinner to at least see part of game in real time 3) fake injury/illness to blow off dinner and/or show, 4) force my kids to watch game in real time at home (logic being that the good mojo may come from my TV). Obviously, many, more exotic options have crossed my mind. All for the sake of reversing the bad mojo that I am convinced is a result of my actions. Call me crazy, wife wife does, but when you are a fan as big as I am, you cannot help it. My actions/routine for every game during our 2011 post season are still fresh in my mind and still pointed to, by my wife, as an example of my obsessiveness as a fan. I know I get crazy, but to me that is the best part of being a fan.
Some of you may think I am crazy, but mojo is mojo and I am am willing to do my part, as I know most of you do, to let this team find it, keep it and run with it.
Your suggestions could prove to be that critical act to keeping our team going.
Help build that mojo!
Go Huskies!!!

 

[dsturdy5]

Rule 1: If you think it will effect the mojo, it will effect the mojo.

 

[SixRings]

I couldn't read all that but first, don't start any bad mojo. A certain Cinci fan did some trolling last week on the BY, started real bad mojo for Cinci, and now he is going to take the wife out for a burger tonight.
Step two, draw some balls on your avatar.

 

[CL82]

What? What? You've missed two key games that were losses for us and you are asking what to do tonight? CRIMENY! WATCH THE GAME MAN!

Tell the wifey that you are the man of the house and you've made a decision and it is as follows:

1. You are watching the game.

2. Dinner will be Rolling Rocks and Wings. That's it. If the other couple doesn't like that, or are vegans or some other lame excuse, they can eat before they come and watch you eat wings and drink the sacreds.

3. She and the other couple may watch with you, but they may not speak during the game, or at least not during UConn free throw attempts.

4. If UConn has a lead at the half, some minimal socializing is acceptable. Suggested topics for conversation include" a) Can Napier win NPOY or will he just need to be content with the Cousey? b) It was a great half, I think we'll pull away in the second and c) Ollie's doing a great job this year. If UConn is not winning at the half, socializing is cancelled as you will be doubling down on the Rolling Rocks.

5. If UConn wins use of -word is authorized in phrases such as F- Yeah! A we did it. F-you Pitino, suck on that! If UConn does not win, everyone will file out of the room silently and will not make eye contact with you. This rule is for their own safety.

That's it. That's exactly what you should do. So man up and act like you have a set of balls. If you been married long enough that you no longer have em, here's a loaner set for you:

EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

 

[dsturdy5]

What? What? You've missed two key games that were losses for us and you are asking what to do tonight? CRIMENY! WATCH THE GAME MAN!

Tell the wifey that you are the man of the house and you've made a decision and it is as follows:

1. You are watching the game.

2. Dinner will be Rolling Rocks and Wings. That's it. If the other couple doesn't like that, or are vegans or some other lame excuse, they can eat before they come and watch eat wings and drink the sacreds.

3. She and the other couple may watch with you, but they may not speak during the game, or at least during UConn free throw attempts.

4. If UConn has a lead at the half, some minimal socializing is acceptable. Suggested topics for conversation include" a) Can Napier win NPOY or will he just need to be content with the Cousey. b) It was a great half, I think we'll pull away in the second and c) Ollie's doing a great job this year. If UConn is not winning at the half, socializing is cancelled as you will be double down on the Rolling Rocks.

5. If UConn wins use of -word is authorized in phrases such as F- Yeah! A we did it. F-you Pitino, suck on that! If UConn does not win, everyone will file out of the room silently and will not make eye contact with you. This rule is for there own safety.

That's it. That's exactly what you should do. So man up and act like you have a set of balls. If you been married long enough that you no longer have em, here's a loaner set for you:

EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

Love it!

(I'll get the link for the divorce attorney thread just in case)

 

[intlzncster]

What? What? You've missed two key games that were losses for us and you are asking what to do tonight? CRIMENY! WATCH THE GAME MAN!

That's it. That's exactly what you should do. So man up and act like you have a set of balls. If you been married long enough that you no longer have em, here's a loaner set for you:

EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

You forgot:

6. Print out a pic of Senhor Testiculo and affix it to a tshirt. Wear this tshirt when you break the news to your wife. Continuing wearing said tshirt while watching the game.

 

[FfldCntyFan]

You need to post "we're doomed" a number of times (as many as necessary for you to feel the mojo reversing).

Try to remember everything that you did on the Saturday three years ago leading up to the last time we faced Louisville for a conference title. Repeat everything that you possibly can.

Continually remind yourself this: Birds don't have balls! Yes, male birds do have testicles but as they are internal (and obviously their is no scrotum) they are not balls. Our opponents tonight do not have a sack.

 

[RichZ]

File for divorce, fly to Memphis, find a scalper and get to the game in person. If you don't and we lose, it will be 100% your fault.

 

[jleves]

1) don't DVR the Game, 2) force wife and friends to sit in bar at dinner to at least see part of game in real time 3) fake injury/illness to blow off dinner and/or show, 4) force my kids to watch game in real time at home (logic being that the good mojo may come from my TV).
Go Huskies!!!

A combination of 1, 2 and 4.

3) is off the table as it flies in the face of good mojo - faking illness is not a ballsy move.

2) is the most important as it requires you to sack up and make a stand for yourself. And not just part of the game, your company is in for about 2.5 hours. Demand it.

1) is just obvious - no real explanation needed.

4) should be a treat. Make sure they have rolling rocks and wings while they watch the game.

 

[intlzncster]

A combination of 1, 2 and 4.

3) is off the table as it flies in the face of good mojo - faking illness is not a ballsy move.

2) is the most important as it requires you to sack up and make a stand for yourself. And not just part of the game, your company is in for about 2.5 hours. Demand it.

Depending on the wife, this could be the ballsiest move of all. If Askgreek has to spend 6-12 months in purgatory for a win, then by all means, he must buck up and get 'er done.

I'm digging the onions. Not quite as aggressive as your last avatar though.

 

[intlzncster]

Continually remind yourself this: Birds don't have balls! Yes, male birds do have testicles but as they are internal (and obviously their is no scrotum) they are not balls. Our opponents tonight do not have a sack.

Huge piece of info. HUGE.

 

[dsturdy5]

Continually remind yourself this: Birds don't have balls! Yes, male birds do have testicles but as they are internal (and obviously their is no scrotum) they are not balls. Our opponents tonight do not have a sack.

And, most large male dogs are not neutered before 6-9 months old. By my calculation, the new pup is only around 5 months old. The earliest he could lose the ability to use them would be after FF weekend...

 

[seanmc94]

Two words; Slump buster

 

[pj]

I need the Boneyard to help advise me on how I can help reverse the bad mojo trend that I am facing today before the team meets the Cardinals in tonight's championship game. My dilemma starts with my experiences before and after the previous two matchups with the Cardinals. I am a devout Husky fan. So much so, that my wife claims I am obsessive about it. So, my point is, I watch or attend each game religiously. Now, here is my issue. I had a family event/obligation conflict during both of the first two matchups with Louisville. If, I have such conflicts, I DVR the games, and then watch them after the event or on a tape delay. These two games, were the only two that were over before I started watching them on delay, and after learning of the outcome, I decided not to watch. So, this brings us to tonight. My wife has planned a dinner and show tonight with our friends. I know I am going to miss the game in its entirety again. So, I feel obligated to seek your advice on how my actions could help reverse the outcome from the first two games. Here are some of my thoughts, keep in mind all of your suggestions are on the table: 1) don't DVR the Game, 2) force wife and friends to sit in bar at dinner to at least see part of game in real time 3) fake injury/illness to blow off dinner and/or show, 4) force my kids to watch game in real time at home (logic being that the good mojo may come from my TV). Obviously, many, more exotic options have crossed my mind. All for the sake of reversing the bad mojo that I am convinced is a result of my actions. Call me crazy, wife wife does, but when you are a fan as big as I am, you cannot help it. My actions/routine for every game during our 2011 post season are still fresh in my mind and still pointed to, by my wife, as an example of my obsessiveness as a fan. I know I get crazy, but to me that is the best part of being a fan.
Some of you may think I am crazy, but mojo is mojo and I am am willing to do my part, as I know most of you do, to let this team find it, keep it and run with it.
Your suggestions could prove to be that critical act to keeping our team going.
Help build that mojo!
Go Huskies!!!

1. Wear a big pair of inflatable balls suspended from your belt.
2. Put the game on your phone and look at it every 20 seconds.

That will reverse all past mojo dereliction.

 

[CL82]

@Askgreek - you didn't watch again, didn't you. You...sicken ...me...sir. Sicken me. If you keep doing the same thing over again how can you ever....

...EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

 

[pj]

@Askgreek - you didn't watch again, didn't you. You...sicken ...me...sir. Sicken me. If you keep doing the same thing over again how can you ever....

...EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

He didn't wear the inflatable balls either.

 

[Askgreek]

@Askgreek - you didn't watch again, didn't you. You...sicken ...me...sir. Sicken me. If you keep doing the same thing over again how can you ever....

...EXPECT SOMETHING DIFFERENT!​

OK, I admit I did not where the inflatable balls, but I did do the following: 1) Forced my kids to watch the game on my TV at home 2) Sat near the bar and positioned my chair to perfectly watch the game on the bar TV with wife and friends 3) Excused myself from dinner to ask the bartender to put the game on (how do these people live in CT and not know to put on the game, insulting) 4) Spaced out for about 85% of the dinner because I was watching the first half and half of the second half (wife kicked me several times under the table, but I just continued to ignore her) 5) realized that my watching live was not helping, so suggested to leave the restaurant as quickly as possible, logic being our comeback would start as soon as I stopped watching and that I would miss it 6) Wife reams me out in car due to my rudeness/insensitivity and she was embarrassed in front of our friends, I explained it will be all worth it once they make a comeback 7) Wife rubs it in my face that my tactics failed both the team and her, so I am left in the dog house with the team, no pun intended.

So, moral of the story, keep trying anything to win the mojo back. Looks like I need to purchase a set of inflatable balls. Logic tells you that it is the only thing left to do, in order to help the team complete their run in the NCAA tournament.

Thanks again to the boneyard for all your help and advice.

Go Huskies!

 

[intlzncster]

Great story. Taking one for the team should hopefully roll over some mojo into the NCAAs.