As a public service, and perhaps as the final act in a descent to madness, I have read through a recruit's Twitter timeline for the first time.
I went back a month because I figure that is the functional memory of a high-school aged male.
First off, he retweeted something from a USC fan. That's cause for concern because their mascot rides a white horse at games and we have no horses at all at ours.
The next day, Vance advised us that his senior year was going 'real smooth'. Is this good news for USC? I don't know, but I know it is good to be Vance right now.
But then, just a few days later, he retweeted one Jennifer Norcross advising him to come to UConn. She is our Joan of Arc lifting the siege began by the USC fan. If this works out, she needs to get a statue on campus. Or maybe not. It's kind of a strange account.
But that broke the dam. Just a day later, Vance retweeted a message from a guy with an egg as an icon. It's pro-UConn, but I am embarrassed by the egg.
For the next week, we're treated to some videos of Vance working out and some other odds and ends. Vance keeps his cards close to the vest...
Until 22 days ago. Some UConny-type person posts about Kevin Ollie and Vance says, yes, I will retweet that.
Vance decides to take some visits and lets the world know. He uses emoji. Cal is a bear. Memphis is a cat. UConn is a fox. I check my iPhone. The fox emoji is right under an actual dog emoji. I am worried.
A battle breaks out. Cal vs. UConn. Memphis can only stand by and watch because the top men are tweeting and Vance is retweeting.
Cal. Then, UConn. Then Cal, followed by Cal again.
Two straight UConn retweets and then Cal stems the rout before it starts.
We settle into a quiet period where Vance retweets people retweeting his tweet. It is like tweeting in a mirror.
Vance tweets that some day the people who do not believe in him will brag that they used to know him. I believe in Vance, but I do not know him. That tweet was not directed at me, I guess.
More workout tweets by Vance because it is time for business and that business is basketball.
Back to the front lines. A Maryland fan is retweeted. I pause. I decide it is a pity retweet and I never think of it again.
We're 12 days out now. Vance goes back to workout videos. Vance drinks Under Armour drinkable stuff. I wonder if the Maryland fan noticed.
Six days out.
A UConn fan is tweeted. He says come to Storrs, Vance. Vance says, I'm gonna retweet that man's thoughts.
Vance works out again. Previously, he pushed something heavy in a straight line. Now he pulls something sideways. Vance is now strong in two directions.
Two days out, Vance has news. He is visiting UConn. The fox, some exclamation points, some clapping hands and a goofy face lead a parade of emojis. The dog is still right above the fox. He has to go right past it to get to the fox. It is okay, I tell myself. The dog is silly looking and the fox is sleek and self-confident.
As the Allies landed on the beach at Normandy, UConn fingers now land on phone screens. Cal and Memphis can only hide in their foxholes because the UConn tanks are racing across the Twitterscape.
Mike Sivo advised Vance that great academics and championships await Vance. Mike's twitter account is @mikeisverynice. Vance agrees and says, retweet.
Seven straight UConn retweets in succession and then someone named Tim says, here is a picture of four national championship banners and we need a fifth. Vance says four banners equals a retweet.
Noah passes along his wishes for Vance to commit to UConn.
Someone named Ace tells Vance that he will be a fan even if he doesn't pick UConn. I see through Ace's gambit and decide he is a liar. Vance, a less cynical soul, retweets without passing judgement.
A few retweets later, Ace tries to explain himself. He bestows the nickname "Vanimal" on Vance. Ace's magnanimous veneer is now split wide open.
Vance is a Jets' fan. I consider tweeting that the Jets hold their summer training camp at UConn. I should have Ace do it.
Twenty straight UConn retweets follow. It is as if Vance and UConn are the only two people left in the world.
Vance takes a deep breath and pines for the start of basketball season. He uses emoji - one is a snail. I get it. Vance uses pictures as easily as he uses words.
There are 18 more UConn retweets, including one showing a painting of a person in a UConn uniform. I think the person is Vance.
That was three hours ago.
Vance now sleeps and we wait.
The trend is positive.
