The Judge Speaks.

[Dove]

Shut up, Dove.

And this, too.

 

[CTBasketball]

 

[Fishy]

Your Honor, I move that FFCountyFan be given a conditional pardon for his inadvertent transgressions. He appears to be a spirted young man with the best of Husky interests at heart. I ask that any hanging be suspended and he be given a chance to redeem his soul. Respectfully.

No

But….we used to enjoy your hijinks. Now you’re just like the Jim Boeheim of the Boneyard. Just take your appreciation day and go home. We shouldn’t have to take you behind the shed and put you out of your misery. Sometimes it’s just better to run off into the woods before the rabies sets in and we never have to see the body.

No one knows who you are.

Can't even be bothered to spell "has" correctly, as he fumbles the mic drop.

No one will read this

The Judge Speaks

Twenty-five years ago, I first put on the robe as Boneyard Judge, trying and sentencing the “Dukie 5” in 1999. I have always taken my responsibilities very seriously here and I have had this year’s tournament in my sights since the final bars of “One Shining Moment” last April.

All season long, I’ve shunned our traditional Chicken Little mentality and this “Doomed!” nonsense. Not because I don’t believe in Mojo, but because our Mojo has grown and morphed. You all speak about being a blue blood, then when everyone says how good we are you shrink away into the shadows like a bunch of pansies. Not anymore. We are the best team in the country. We have been a wrecking ball for 13 months and we are about to demolish any unlucky team that is forced to share the same floor with us the rest of the way.

To do that…

1. @August_West is banned from posting the rest of the season. This is more out of principle than for Mojo’s sake. As your Judge, I will not allow someone to disappear all season, fraternize with the PC board because he says “I don't like most of you”, then decide he feels like coming back for the final run at a repeat title. If you’d like to discuss the UConn tourney run from here? I’m sure the Friar fans would love to hear all about it. Mods - Please remove his posting privileges immediately.
   
   
2. Ready the gallows for @CL82 , @FfldCntyFan and @prankster . All season long, at any mention of your esteemed Judge, these 3 instantly dove into the same tired routine. And, I get it. They’re of limited intelligence and incapable of anything funny or innovative. The Three Stooges of the Boneyard.
   
   But, as I’ve said all year, this ain’t the time. We are on the precipice of a repeat National Championship. Hallowed ground. Maybe the greatest 2 year run of any team dating back to the Wooden UCLA times. But no. They kept forcefeeding their nonsense back at your Judge and shunning the 25 years of thankless effort by me leading to our 5 National Championships. And, for those discretions? The Moe, Larry and Curly of the Yard will hang.
   
   
3. For the first time, we will also have a ceremonial judgement to celebrate the silver anniversary and a quarter century of Boneyard Justice. To commemorate the original Dukie 5, @Dove will get his skinny little pencil neck stretched again. But Judge Deepster! What Mojo could Dove possible conjur up?! Nothing. It’s like flicking a spent Bic lighter over and over and getting no flame…but he’s never once showed an ounce of remorse for picking Duke over UConn in 1999 and the Yard never forgets.

1) The Providence thing is weird. I looked...he's basically a regular there.

2) Those three will have to suck it up.

3) Shut up, Dove.

 

[Hans Sprungfeld]

No one knows who you are.

POOR GUY, HUH? CAN'T GET PAST THE VELVET ROPE.

BUT SERIOUSLY, ARE YOU A HEATHER OR A PLASTIC WHEN YOU SAY THAT?

No one will read this

LIKE LAST TIME, I'LL BET YOU'RE MORE THAN 90% RIGHT (AND SO WHAT?)

SOME PEOPLE (READ: "NOBODIES") ARE READING IT, AND SUCH A BLANKET DISMISSAL IS EITHER AN UNTRUTH OR YOU'RE MISSING OUT ON THE GOOD PARTS.

WORSE STILL, SOME PEOPLE ARE AFRAID TO READ IT. THEY JUST WANNA BE LIKE THE RAMONES SINGING, "I'M AGAINST IT," OR MAYBE STICKING FINGERS IN THEIR EARS & GOING, "LALALALA." I HOPE YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THEM.

BUT DON'T WORRY, I'M NOT BACKING AWAY FROM MY BET THAT YOU'RE MORE THAN 90% RIGHT, SO THERE IS THAT.

1) The Providence thing is weird. I looked...he's basically a regular there.

2) Those three will have to suck it up.

3) Shut up, Dove.

How quaint.

You weren't, perchance, part of the legion that "begged" the Judge to come back & rescue last season when he "hinted" that he "might" retire, were you? That claim strained credibility like some explanations from the Selection Committee. Say it ain't so.

 

[August_West]

1) The Providence thing is weird. I looked...he's basically a regular there.

You're a pragmatist, and also one of only a couple dozen or so who have been here longer than me. Think of it this way:

Would you, after all this time, want to spend all message board time among the likes of "soft as Duke" Deepster or that idiot Dove? Especially since we've now added a bull rush of frontrunning bandwagoners this year to that aforementioned braintrust ? We've lost our edge. We are fat and complacent, and the ones who aren't are entitled know nothing noobs who puff their chests based on the last year with no prior sweat equity. Sometimes it is needed to remind oneself what it is like to be hungry, to see how a season of a team with little to no tournament success, but a feisty, passionate fan base, navigates the message board world.

The boneyard is like Rocky Balboa in Rocky 3, getting fat and happy and then getting his ass kicked by Clubber Lang. Think of me as Apollo Creed taking Rocky back to his hard roots.

 

[Deepster]

You're a pragmatist, and also one of only a couple dozen or so who have been here longer than me. Think of it this way:

Would you, after all this time, want to spend all message board time among the likes of "soft as Duke" Deepster or that idiot Dove? Especially since we've now added a bull rush of frontrunning bandwagoners this year to that aforementioned braintrust ? We've lost our edge. We are fat and complacent, and the ones who aren't are entitled know nothing noobs who puff their chests based on the last year with no prior sweat equity. Sometimes it is needed to remind oneself what it is like to be hungry, to see how a season of a team with little to no tournament success, but a feisty, passionate fan base, navigates the message board world.

The boneyard is like Rocky Balboa in Rocky 3, getting fat and happy and then getting his ass kicked by Clubber Lang. Think of me as Apollo Creed taking Rocky back to his hard roots.

Oh good. I can't wait for more Arby's content.

Can we ban this guy please? I'm trying to win us a title here.

 

[Huskyforlife]

You're a pragmatist, and also one of only a couple dozen or so who have been here longer than me. Think of it this way:

Would you, after all this time, want to spend all message board time among the likes of "soft as Duke" Deepster or that idiot Dove? Especially since we've now added a bull rush of frontrunning bandwagoners this year to that aforementioned braintrust ? We've lost our edge. We are fat and complacent, and the ones who aren't are entitled know nothing noobs who puff their chests based on the last year with no prior sweat equity. Sometimes it is needed to remind oneself what it is like to be hungry, to see how a season of a team with little to no tournament success, but a feisty, passionate fan base, navigates the message board world.

The boneyard is like Rocky Balboa in Rocky 3, getting fat and happy and then getting his ass kicked by Clubber Lang. Think of me as Apollo Creed taking Rocky back to his hard roots.

But are you a Providence fan now? It’s one thing to occasionally take the temperature of a fan base you admire, it’s another to be regularly interacting with another community more than the one you claim to belong to.

 

[August_West]

But are you a Providence fan now? It’s one thing to occasionally take the temperature of a fan base you admire, it’s another to be regularly interacting with another community more than the one you claim to belong to.

"I don't want to belong to any club that would have me as a member"

 

[August_West]

Oh good. I can't wait for more Arby's content.

Can we ban this guy please? I'm trying to win us a title here.

Can't you just put me on your ignore list? According to you it's growing daily.

 

[prankster]

"I don't want to belong to any club that would have me as a member"

Thanks, Groucho.

 

[Deepster]

Can't you just put me on your ignore list? According to you it's growing daily.

Your influence here is over, Traitor. The Yard never forgets.

 

[Samoo]

Oh good. I can't wait for more Arby's content.

Can we ban this guy please? I'm trying to win us a title here.

Banning August does little more than revert back to the situation as it stood for 90% of the season, a welcome reprieve but hardly earth shattering. It's weak and in a month, no one - including August - will even remember it happened. Right target - wrong sentence.

 

[Deepster]

Banning August does little more than revert back to the situation as it stood for 90% of the season, a welcome reprieve but hardly earth shattering. It's weak and in a month, no one - including August - will even remember it happened. Right target - wrong sentence.

Fair points. End of the day, he doesn't deserve to be here for this.

 

[Samoo]

Fair points. End of the day, he doesn't deserve to be here for this.

Your "Friar West" has a certain ring to it. Couldn't you come up with something creative there?

 

[August_West]

Fair points. End of the day, he doesn't deserve to be here for this.

Live look in at the state of Simple Judges sentencing

toothless

 

[Waquoit]

Is this is Stockholm syndrome situation?

 

[Mr. Wonderful]

I have to remind myself everyone who posted on this thread is a grown @ss adult. It's hilarious.

 

[Deepster]

Live look in at the state of Simple Judges sentencing



toothless

 

[Hans Sprungfeld]

You're a pragmatist, and also one of only a couple dozen or so who have been here longer than me. Think of it this way:

Would you, after all this time, want to spend all message board time among the likes of "soft as Duke" Deepster or that idiot Dove? Especially since we've now added a bull rush of frontrunning bandwagoners this year to that aforementioned braintrust ? We've lost our edge. We are fat and complacent, and the ones who aren't are entitled know nothing noobs who puff their chests based on the last year with no prior sweat equity. Sometimes it is needed to remind oneself what it is like to be hungry, to see how a season of a team with little to no tournament success, but a feisty, passionate fan base, navigates the message board world.

The boneyard is like Rocky Balboa in Rocky 3, getting fat and happy and then getting his ass kicked by Clubber Lang. Think of me as Apollo Creed taking Rocky back to his hard roots.

I realize that I'm recasting your offered self-conception, but I see this season for you as having been more like a visiting professorship.

You weren't on sabbatical, you maintained your primary affiliation, and seemed to have continued your work in a new setting.

In such recognized instances, one doesn't have to get involved in administrative details, committee meetings, or department politics. Those things can be boring time sucks and merry-go-rounds of interminable pettiness.

If you set it up right, maybe you have more time to be with family at a time when - no matter what magic the home team is up to - there's something on the home front that's irrefutably more meaningful, and quite certainly temporal.

The time in a new space isn't necessarily about breaking new ground, or plying your same old same old in a conventionally more exotic locale, but it's still special.

I imagine that you've represented your home institution in good faith and with a generous spirit, to the benefit of others, without a shrinking fear that you might be giving away the good stuff in a disloyal or dangerous way.

You already know the UConn fanbase travels well; your actions have expanded the definition of that term. I wander Kentuckiana in UConn gear, and (so far) people are friendly, polite, and complimentary ("bless my heart").

A quarter century ago, I witnessed similar temporary exchanges, as high-performance faculty criss-crossed from one side of Washington Square Park to the other for a semester or a year, but never for a full-scale switch.

I don't think The Boneyard is necessarily as insufferable as you and some other long-timers might sometimes find it, but I can understand the mindframe.

I've been registered, logged in, and engaged at various depths since summer of 1999, after a bunch of years on dial-up AOL.

I got to this version of the yard in the 4th week of August 2011, and I'm well aware that there's a good bunch of folks who aren't so enamored with such a pedigree. They're neither wrong nor right, nor are those who feel the opposite.

Throughout, I've stayed a nobody of sorts, at least in relation to the 'cool kids' and gatekeepers, but it's just plain vanilla facts that I was in the Field House going back to 1961-62, so that adds up to nearly 3 decades before the Dream Season, and nearly 4 decades before a National Championship, which my season ticket-holder dad never experienced.

Some of the scorekeeping here is on par with our current day nemesis "Karen" looking for the manager to register a complaint with whose in charge, except it's more like the manager trying to continually assert, "I'm in charge" in an ever-changing world where the center won't hold, nobody's in charge, and arrangements are so fractured and temporary and bewildering that two teams from California will be joining the Atlantic Coast Conference next year, along with one from Texas (at least that's what I think it is).

"Indifference" is more recently being offered as "the opposite of love," or at least posited as being more harmful than hate, so I don't want to make too much light of being Ignored. But that's just my orientation against unsustainable self-certainty, overreaching, and hubris. I'll just say that, while I could be wrong, being Ignored doesn't seem like the worst thing to receive as a threat. It's probably worse to be feeling like that's all you've got when there's really a big old wonderful world of all kinds of folks to celebrate Huskymania with...even if it's more than 90% bettable that nobody's gonna read this.

Less than 72 hours until tip-off, eh?

Go Huskies!

 

[August_West]

I realize that I'm recasting your offered self-conception, but I see this season for you as having been more like a visiting professorship.

You weren't on sabbatical, you maintained your primary affiliation, and seemed to have continued your work in a new setting.

In such recognized instances, one doesn't have to get involved in administrative details, committee meetings, or department politics. Those things can be boring time sucks and merry-go-rounds of interminable pettiness.

If you set it up right, maybe you have more time to be with family at a time when - no matter what magic the home team is up to - there's something on the home front that's irrefutably more meaningful, and quite certainly temporal.

The time in a new space isn't necessarily about breaking new ground, or plying your same old same old in a conventionally more exotic locale, but it's still special.

I imagine that you've represented your home institution in good faith and with a generous spirit, to the benefit of others, without a shrinking fear that you might be giving away the good stuff in a disloyal or dangerous way.

You already know the UConn fanbase travels well; your actions have expanded the definition of that term. I wander Kentuckiana in UConn gear, and (so far) people are friendly, polite, and complimentary ("bless my heart").

A quarter century ago, I witnessed similar temporary exchanges, as high-performance faculty criss-crossed from one side of Washington Square Park to the other for a semester or a year, but never for a full-scale switch.

I don't think The Boneyard is necessarily as insufferable as you and some other long-timers might sometimes find it, but I can understand the mindframe.

I've been registered, logged in, and engaged at various depths since summer of 1999, after a bunch of years on dial-up AOL.

I got to this version of the yard in the 4th week of August 2011, and I'm well aware that there's a good bunch of folks who aren't so enamored with such a pedigree. They're neither wrong nor right, nor are those who feel the opposite.

Throughout, I've stayed a nobody of sorts, at least in relation to the 'cool kids' and gatekeepers, but it's just plain vanilla facts that I was in the Field House going back to 1961-62, so that adds up to nearly 3 decades before the Dream Season, and nearly 4 decades before a National Championship, which my season ticket-holder dad never experienced.

Some of the scorekeeping here is on par with our current day nemesis "Karen" looking for the manager to register a complaint with whose in charge, except it's more like the manager trying to continually assert, "I'm in charge" in an ever-changing world where the center won't hold, nobody's in charge, and arrangements are so fractured and temporary and bewildering that two teams from California will be joining the Atlantic Coast Conference next year, along with one from Texas (at least that's what I think it is).

"Indifference" is more recently being offered as "the opposite of love," or at least posited as being more harmful than hate, so I don't want to make too much light of being Ignored. But that's just my orientation against unsustainable self-certainty, overreaching, and hubris. I'll just say that, while I could be wrong, being Ignored doesn't seem like the worst thing to receive as a threat. It's probably worse to be feeling like that's all you've got when there's really a big old wonderful world of all kinds of folks to celebrate Huskymania with...even if it's more than 90% bettable that nobody's gonna read this.

Less than 72 hours until tip-off, eh?

Go Huskies!