Positive Posters

[DobbsRover2]

In the season where the Grinch, Scrooge, and ornery dyspeptic curmudgeons should have their proper place, too many BYers have been wallowing in a happy peppy spirit that is just not right. Too much of this unreasonable cheer can lead to false positives, which are nothing to be glad about. Before things get out of hand, I want to do my sourly best duty to point out a dozen realities that we of the Bunch of Debbie Downers would wish you all to know.

The 12 Nays to Cheeriness

1. No ceiling. UConn has no place up to go because its head is already lodged in the ceiling, and that's a very uncomfortable place to be, as I well know from having balanced new sheet rock on my head while drilling it into the old ceiling. Some may see this as a glass all full, but I like to keep pouring it on, but that's a problem when you're glass is already full. Sure they could become #1 in some category like scoring margin, but this is basically as good as it gets for the Huskies, and that can't be good.
   
2. Notre Dame does not want to play UConn. Why not? The only reason I can think of is that they don't like UConn's rude fans, especially ones who disparage their best players on forum sites. Shame on you all.
3. Bad on freebies. The FT% is down 3.7% from last year. How do you expect to win any games if you can't hit your free throws?
4. Chicken soup. The Huskies have not played any of the top 5 teams in the country. If they want to be the best, they have to play the best. And it's too late now to say they're sorry and start playing some real teams.
   
5. Noncontributors. I don't want to name names here, but there are a couple of players who haven't grabbed a rebound or scored a point for the Huskies in the last 7 games. We all know the story of the stone soup, and everyone should be helping out or bad feelings can start simmering.
6. Bad on the boards. Opponents have been averaging 1.7 more rebounds against the Huskies than they did last year. If you don't box out, you'll get knocked out. It would be a little different if UConn was also averaging more rebounds this year, but they're stuck at that same 42.8 number as last year.
   
7. Sweat wipers. I've seen some reports that the workers who are paid to clean the floors aren't doing their jobs properly. If they don't care anymore, who will?
8. Tennessee does not want to play UConn. The Volunteers are off playing teams from California and the Bahamas or funny-sounding schools like Lipscomb (why in sweet jeepers are they combing their lips?). Why don't they like UConn anymore, and what did the Huskies do to make them mad? Again, I suspect those forum posters are doing things to those nice folk.
9. Can't buy a three. UConn's 3-pt shooting is down a miserable 4.1% from last year. Opponents are just going to pack it inside and yell "Nah-nah-nah nah-nah-nah" anytime a Husky sets up beyond the perimeter. That's no good.
10. No one's wearing nos. 34, 5 or 32 this year. How can you win if no one's wearing nos. 34, 5, or 32?
11. Too many New York girls. All I see is NY girls throwing the ball around out there, with Breanna, Bria, Stefanie, and Soniya being the main culprits. They come from that Empire State, and that sounds evil to me. Geno should find some nice girls from Alaska to play for UConn.
    
12. Deadball rebounding is up. In its glory year last season, UConn kept its deadball rebounding below the critical 2.0 mark at 1.92, but this year it is right at 2.00. Simply put, you can't win if you have a dead ball, and the team is going to have to figure out how to keep the thing alive. Not hopeful about that.

Deck the halls with doom and dolor.

 

[JRRRJ]

You forgot some important ones:

0. The number of available players hasn't increased in months, and won't for many more months. We're only 5 more accidents/injuries/illnesses away from not being able to field a team!
0a. The arena for many of the "home" games is still outdated and expensive. Not a showcase for a rafter-height assemblage of cagers.
0b. Attendance at games is not a packed house. How can you be called a truly elite team if your arena isn't chock-full of roaring supporters?
0c. Uniformity of hairstyles is down by a large percentage. Aren't "teams" suppposed to be "in uniform"?

 

[meyers7]

0c. Uniformity of hairstyles is down by a large percentage. Aren't "teams" suppposed to be "in uniform"?

Not only that, some of the "girls" keep changing their hairstyle around. Sometimes it's in a bun, sometimes it's in a ponytail. Much, much too confusing for us old timers.

 

[caramel]

chicken soup-seems to me they played Stanford,who was number 3 at the time of tip off.Seems to me they have scheduled Duke,who are at this time number 2 in the rankings.
no ceiling-I wonder if any other teams would pass on being the best or at least,one of the best teams in the country year after year.

 

[wallman]

As long as they don't wear headbands and start ripping them off at halftime

 

[DobbsRover2]

chicken soup-seems to me they played Stanford,who was number 3 at the time of tip off.Seems to me they have scheduled Duke,who are at this time number 2 in the rankings.
no ceiling-I wonder if any other teams would pass on being the best or at least,one of the best teams in the country year after year.

What has that got to do with anything, you false positivist? Check the rankings. Has UConn played the #1 team? No, except in practice, which doesn't count. Has it played the #2 team? No. Has it played the #3 team? No. Has it played the #4 team? No. Has it played the #5 team? No. Case closed. And as said, any actions taken at this point to rectify the problem are just too late.

You mirth-mongers just make me extra crabby.

 

[Zorro]

Painstakingly researched and convincingly presented, Senor Dobbs. No thinking and objective person could find fault. It would seem that we are doomed, or shockingly close to doomed. Thank you for having the tough-mindedness and perspicacity to point these things out. TonyC, please take note!

 

[DobbsRover2]

Painstakingly researched and convincingly presented, Senor Dobbs. No thinking and objective person could find fault. It would seem that we are doomed, or shockingly close to doomed. Thank you for having the tough-mindedness and perspicacity to point these things out. TonyC, please take note!

Damn, you just had to bring up Tony, didn't you. Now it's going to get this thread locked down for sure, just like the other one on Posters. Thanks for being pleasantly stoic and just ruining my holiday season.

 

[ChicagoGG]

As long as they don't wear headbands and start ripping them off at halftime

Unless you are like Meghan Gardler, and you follow fixing your pontyail with a big time three.....

 

[caramel]

What has that got to do with anything, you false positivist? Check the rankings. Has UConn played the #1 team? No, except in practice, which doesn't count. Has it played the #2 team? No. Has it played the #3 team? No. Has it played the #4 team? No. Has it played the #5 team? No. Case closed. And as said, any actions taken at this point to rectify the problem are just too late.

You mirth-mongers just make me extra crabby.

Please explain to me how I am a false positivist.I believe in this team,and feel it will excel not only this year,but years to come.

 

[wire chief]

Not only that, some of the "girls" keep changing their hairstyle around. Sometimes it's in a bun, sometimes it's in a ponytail. Much, much too confusing for us old timers.

Do not, Mr. Meyers, do not, I say, forget that fixing the ponytail in front of a packed house and TV audience is the forerunner of the THREE.

 

[pinotbear]

Please explain to me how I am a false positivist.I believe in this team,and feel it will excel not only this year,but years to come.

This is what happens when somebody - in this case Dobbs - posts a purely tongue-in-cheek thread, and does too good a job with it. HuskyBill did something similar a couple of weeks back. Honestly, caramel, he don't mean it - it's entirely sarcastic, meant to poke fun at those of us who relentless look at every silver-lined cloud, searching for that gloomy aspect..

And, Dobbs me boyo, that's what the lil' face icons are for - to let ever'body know youse being a wise guy.

 

[DobbsRover2]

This is what happens when somebody - in this case Dobbs - posts a purely tongue-in-cheek thread, and does too good a job with it. HuskyBill did something similar a couple of weeks back. Honestly, caramel, he don't mean it - it's entirely sarcastic, meant to poke fun at those of us who relentless look at every silver-lined cloud, searching for that gloomy aspect..

And, Dobbs me boyo, that's what the lil' face icons are for - to let ever'body know youse being a wise guy.

There, happy? You can take your silver lined cloud and insert it up somebody's big gloomy aspect. Bah and humbug.

 

[pinotbear]

that's the spirit!