Took a quick look it's @119,000, if you are counting only the shore towns.
Old Lyme 7603 (2010)
East Lyme 19159 (2010)
Waterford 19517 (2010)
New London 27545 (2013)
Groton (city) 40115 (2010)
Mystic 4205 (2010)
Stonington 922 (2013)
It would be more if you added the abuting northerly towns, like Lyme, Ledyard, North Stonington, etc, but you are absolutely correct that for the most part it is suburban.
So if you are looking for a urban environment, you won't find it in southeastern Connecticut. What you will find is some gorgeous country.
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