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Message: [QUOTE="borninansonia, post: 2716972, member: 184"] Insert the purified, freeze dried, DNA tested poop into the newborn's gut immediately after birth. Usually the first microbes to populate the gut are those they stay around for the life of the human host. Many recent studies suggest that fecal transplants at time of birth can affect the long term health of the brain and body of the recipient. Many wealthy Americans have expressed interest in fecal transplants from athletes for their newborns. Interestingly, our Chinese clients are much much more interested in the poop from brilliant American entrepreneurs for their newborns, who also have a lot of poop to give. Prices are astronomical, with most of the entrepreneurs giving the money for their poop to charity. The highest prices we get are from the religious crowd, and the suppliers, top religious figures in the world. Insert poop from top religious figures at time of birth of the newborn, and the parents are ensured that their babies will go to heaven. Very expensive poop. We call it "Pope's poop" but to be clear, the Pope has not yet signed up to be a donor. He can make a billion dollars in one year for the church if he does sign up. There is a lot of poop there and a lot of people wanting to buy his poop. [/QUOTE]