Dove
Who wouldn't want to be me?
- Joined
- Aug 26, 2011
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In the past I have shared my past excursions of me caroling by myself in my old Meriden neybahood. Often I went home empty in the heart having received very little joy in either singing to people who looked at me in shock instead of joy...and having little joy in singing to people who would rather keep their porch light out while I labored through "White Christmas" for the 8th freakin' time.
Well, two years ago I moved to a nice shoreline town and it had to be different, right? The homes on my street were decked out in lights and looked majestic in their angelic luminescence. Four days ago I summoned the nerve to do the caroling thing again and this time the family was coming with me as they promised. Tonight was the night!
The first to bail was Mrs. Dove, my rock. Something about me having wrapped absolutely no presents and the house, especially my cellar, looked like . Pfffthh! Next up was my moms but she's old and the knee is bad. My sister would rather watch ice skating and two cousins were definitely in but drunk and needed to be picked up. Not happening.
So out I went to the first house, no back up singers, with my song sheets at the ready. My immediate neighbors had the lights on when I rang the bell. Then I rang it again just as the kitchen light went out and an upstairs room. Then another light. I went into "Jingle Bells" so they knew it wasn't anything bad but I left the yard in total darkness. As I approached the second house I could see the lights going out. Did they just get a freakin' phone call?
The third house was beautiful and decked out to the hilt. The remnants of a snow man greeted me at the porch. I knew kids lived here and I hoped they would enjoy a little "Frosty the Snowman". As I rang the bell I just had time to remember that they had a bull mastiff and started barking immediately. The door opened with the father frantically holding the dog yelling "Thor, stoppit!!". I went right into song. The mother of the house held a young girl who started crying and I reached the second verse with a big smile on my face and a door being slammed in my face.The dog barked constantly as I walked the long driveway to the street.
Okaaaaaaay.
I was bummed and talked myself into going across the street. A smaller house was dark and when I took a few steps onto the driveway a motion detector came on exposing an empty house. Rain was coming down now and my spirit was waning. I thought this town was going to be different.
Two nice lesbians live in the house across the street from me and they were home. I was on my way. I grabbed their knockers and rapped the door. I heard their voices as they approached the door and timed it perfectly. This was gonna be great. A great end to another Dovian solo caroling event! I was stoked!! As they opened the door I bellowed "Dike the halls with boughs of holly!!!"
I then heard "call the police" and a door slam.
I sit here at my laptop waiting for the knock on the door. No more caroling for me...ever.
Well, two years ago I moved to a nice shoreline town and it had to be different, right? The homes on my street were decked out in lights and looked majestic in their angelic luminescence. Four days ago I summoned the nerve to do the caroling thing again and this time the family was coming with me as they promised. Tonight was the night!
The first to bail was Mrs. Dove, my rock. Something about me having wrapped absolutely no presents and the house, especially my cellar, looked like . Pfffthh! Next up was my moms but she's old and the knee is bad. My sister would rather watch ice skating and two cousins were definitely in but drunk and needed to be picked up. Not happening.
So out I went to the first house, no back up singers, with my song sheets at the ready. My immediate neighbors had the lights on when I rang the bell. Then I rang it again just as the kitchen light went out and an upstairs room. Then another light. I went into "Jingle Bells" so they knew it wasn't anything bad but I left the yard in total darkness. As I approached the second house I could see the lights going out. Did they just get a freakin' phone call?
The third house was beautiful and decked out to the hilt. The remnants of a snow man greeted me at the porch. I knew kids lived here and I hoped they would enjoy a little "Frosty the Snowman". As I rang the bell I just had time to remember that they had a bull mastiff and started barking immediately. The door opened with the father frantically holding the dog yelling "Thor, stoppit!!". I went right into song. The mother of the house held a young girl who started crying and I reached the second verse with a big smile on my face and a door being slammed in my face.The dog barked constantly as I walked the long driveway to the street.
Okaaaaaaay.
I was bummed and talked myself into going across the street. A smaller house was dark and when I took a few steps onto the driveway a motion detector came on exposing an empty house. Rain was coming down now and my spirit was waning. I thought this town was going to be different.
Two nice lesbians live in the house across the street from me and they were home. I was on my way. I grabbed their knockers and rapped the door. I heard their voices as they approached the door and timed it perfectly. This was gonna be great. A great end to another Dovian solo caroling event! I was stoked!! As they opened the door I bellowed "Dike the halls with boughs of holly!!!"
I then heard "call the police" and a door slam.
I sit here at my laptop waiting for the knock on the door. No more caroling for me...ever.
