WCBB Roundtable Interrupted by UConn-Mercer Game (satire) | The Boneyard

WCBB Roundtable Interrupted by UConn-Mercer Game (satire)

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March 21 (Connie DisUPI) -- In a truly disconcerting display of sports synergy gone wrong, an ABC studio discussion of women’s college basketball suffered repeated interruption by Saturday’s first-round NCAA tournament action pitting the Connecticut Huskies against the Mercer Bears. Commentators Stephanie White and Pam Ward were the unfortunate victims of an obvious snafu at a corporate level. For nearly 90 minutes, the two struggled to keep the matter on point as their insights clashed with an erroneous live-feed of a game being played in Storrs, Connecticut.

Matters did not have an auspicious beginning. White and Ward exchanged opening salvos on injuries and their significance to basketball competitiveness. In contrast, audiences were shown UConn’s tenacious defense leading to a shot-clock violation on Mercer’s second possession. This seemed to momentarily unnerve White and Ward as the two abandoned their discussion, and instead spent the next five minutes actually commenting on Mercer’s scrappy defense and UConn’s back court pressure. To their credit, the two got matters back on track, returning the conversation to basketball injuries. UConn substituted in Big East defensive player of the year Nika Muhl. However, the White-Ward team remained on point as they discussed the effects of COVID and Azzi Fudd’s early season foot injury. Even the subsequent substitutions of the Huskies’ Evina Westbrook and Caroline Ducharme could not unnerve the ABC duo. They remained focused laser-like on the importance of pre-game preparation and finding the right pieces to building a competitive basketball team.

Unfortunately, from this point on not even the most experienced journalist could remain immune from the constant distractions wrought by ABC’s technical breakdown. White’s discussion of Westbrook’s transfer from Tennessee to Connecticut was momentarily sidetracked when Dorka Juhasz’s crisp footwork drew an offensive foul on Mercer guard Endia Banks. Ward, in contrast, remained resolute. Ducharme’s sneaky steal, drive and underhanded lay-up may have impressed fans at the game. But it was no match for Ward’s pointed analysis of Mercer’s program-building over previous seasons. Unfortunately, another Ducharme steal and score, followed by a Christyn Williams steal and layup on an inbounds pass, precipitated further trouble. White and Ward fought to maintain focus as ABC apparently could not figure out how to cut the live-feed. At one point, Ward actually discussed UConn’s teamwork, pausing to note yet another offensive foul induced by the Huskies’ suffocating defense.

Alas, the technical breakdown could not be endured. Mid-way through the 90-minute special, the White-Ward conversation reached a complete standstill. Puzzled audiences were met by two minutes and fifteen seconds of total silence coupled with end-to-end third quarter action. From this point on, the live-feed increasingly undermined all efforts at a productive conversation. A Paige Buecker’s steal-and-score, a Ducharme 3-pointer from the corner, and a Ducharme-to-Williams fastbreak ruined a bracing account of Mercer guard Erin Houpt (including whether this “true freshman” really is 5’6”). In fairness to ABC, a subsequent shot to the mouth of Nika Muhl did suggest a connection: Houpt and Muhl are both guards; each are under 6’; and both possess a one-syllable last name.

In the end, Ward’s talent in salvaging a potential disaster cannot be overstated. As the matter approached closure, she nimbly snatched defeat from the jaws of victory—querying whether UConn forward Aaliyah Edwards’ purple and gold braids just might be an hommage to the Minnesota Vikings. And yet, perhaps the live-feed did not pose as much a threat to conceptual continuity as might have appeared. After all, Mercer did not score a point during the third quarter. So how much of a distraction could the game have been? In this sense, ABC technicians may not bear full responsibility for this confusing hybrid of arm-chair reflection and real-time tournament competition. In any case, we can be reasonably confident the good people at ABC will work out the bugs in the near future. A prime-time April 3 “Up-Close and Personal” 90-minute special on UConn head coach Geno Auriemma is rumored to be in the works.
 

Bama fan

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March 21 (Connie DisUPI) -- In a truly disconcerting display of sports synergy gone wrong, an ABC studio discussion of women’s college basketball suffered repeated interruption by Saturday’s first-round NCAA tournament action pitting the Connecticut Huskies against the Mercer Bears. Commentators Stephanie White and Pam Ward were the unfortunate victims of an obvious snafu at a corporate level. For nearly 90 minutes, the two struggled to keep the matter on point as their insights clashed with an erroneous live-feed of a game being played in Storrs, Connecticut.

Matters did not have an auspicious beginning. White and Ward exchanged opening salvos on injuries and their significance to basketball competitiveness. In contrast, audiences were shown UConn’s tenacious defense leading to a shot-clock violation on Mercer’s second possession. This seemed to momentarily unnerve White and Ward as the two abandoned their discussion, and instead spent the next five minutes actually commenting on Mercer’s scrappy defense and UConn’s back court pressure. To their credit, the two got matters back on track, returning the conversation to basketball injuries. UConn substituted in Big East defensive player of the year Nika Muhl. However, the White-Ward team remained on point as they discussed the effects of COVID and Azzi Fudd’s early season foot injury. Even the subsequent substitutions of the Huskies’ Evina Westbrook and Caroline Ducharme could not unnerve the ABC duo. They remained focused laser-like on the importance of pre-game preparation and finding the right pieces to building a competitive basketball team.

Unfortunately, from this point on not even the most experienced journalist could remain immune from the constant distractions wrought by ABC’s technical breakdown. White’s discussion of Westbrook’s transfer from Tennessee to Connecticut was momentarily sidetracked when Dorka Juhasz’s crisp footwork drew an offensive foul on Mercer guard Endia Banks. Ward, in contrast, remained resolute. Ducharme’s sneaky steal, drive and underhanded lay-up may have impressed fans at the game. But it was no match for Ward’s pointed analysis of Mercer’s program-building over previous seasons. Unfortunately, another Ducharme steal and score, followed by a Christyn Williams steal and layup on an inbounds pass, precipitated further trouble. White and Ward fought to maintain focus as ABC apparently could not figure out how to cut the live-feed. At one point, Ward actually discussed UConn’s teamwork, pausing to note yet another offensive foul induced by the Huskies’ suffocating defense.

Alas, the technical breakdown could not be endured. Mid-way through the 90-minute special, the White-Ward conversation reached a complete standstill. Puzzled audiences were met by two minutes and fifteen seconds of total silence coupled with end-to-end third quarter action. From this point on, the live-feed increasingly undermined all efforts at a productive conversation. A Paige Buecker’s steal-and-score, a Ducharme 3-pointer from the corner, and a Ducharme-to-Williams fastbreak ruined a bracing account of Mercer guard Erin Houpt (including whether this “true freshman” really is 5’6”). In fairness to ABC, a subsequent shot to the mouth of Nika Muhl did suggest a connection: Houpt and Muhl are both guards; each are under 6’; and both possess a one-syllable last name.

In the end, Ward’s talent in salvaging a potential disaster cannot be overstated. As the matter approached closure, she nimbly snatched defeat from the jaws of victory—querying whether UConn forward Aaliyah Edwards’ purple and gold braids just might be an hommage to the Minnesota Vikings. And yet, perhaps the live-feed did not pose as much a threat to conceptual continuity as might have appeared. After all, Mercer did not score a point during the third quarter. So how much of a distraction could the game have been? In this sense, ABC technicians may not bear full responsibility for this confusing hybrid of arm-chair reflection and real-time tournament competition. In any case, we can be reasonably confident the good people at ABC will work out the bugs in the near future. A prime-time April 3 “Up-Close and Personal” 90-minute special on UConn head coach Geno Auriemma is rumored to be in the works.
Another comedic masterpiece by @connie. Too bad she has to tell some people it is satire!
 

UcMiami

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Absolutely love it!
Should send a copy to ABC, Pam, and Stephanie!

I blame the talk fests in all sports broadcasting on the original Monday Night Football (hey if two announcers is good, three should really be great) and the Olympics TV broadcasting where human interest segments slowly overran all those weird sports no one really understands.
 

Centerstream

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At least they mentioned that they will be going to the Wichita Region next weekend.
 
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It seems that networks instruct the commentators to teach the "New" audience about the women's game which they seem to think will increase viewership. of course the majority of the viewers are already fans of the game. It often seems to me that this happens less where they have a man doing play by play as they seem less caught up in the babble. Maybe because some of them are fairly new to the women's game. Thi particular pair were, IMHO the worst I have ever had to mute.
 
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March 21 (Connie DisUPI) -- In a truly disconcerting display of sports synergy gone wrong, an ABC studio discussion of women’s college basketball suffered repeated interruption by Saturday’s first-round NCAA tournament action pitting the Connecticut Huskies against the Mercer Bears. Commentators Stephanie White and Pam Ward were the unfortunate victims of an obvious snafu at a corporate level. For nearly 90 minutes, the two struggled to keep the matter on point as their insights clashed with an erroneous live-feed of a game being played in Storrs, Connecticut.

Matters did not have an auspicious beginning. White and Ward exchanged opening salvos on injuries and their significance to basketball competitiveness. In contrast, audiences were shown UConn’s tenacious defense leading to a shot-clock violation on Mercer’s second possession. This seemed to momentarily unnerve White and Ward as the two abandoned their discussion, and instead spent the next five minutes actually commenting on Mercer’s scrappy defense and UConn’s back court pressure. To their credit, the two got matters back on track, returning the conversation to basketball injuries. UConn substituted in Big East defensive player of the year Nika Muhl. However, the White-Ward team remained on point as they discussed the effects of COVID and Azzi Fudd’s early season foot injury. Even the subsequent substitutions of the Huskies’ Evina Westbrook and Caroline Ducharme could not unnerve the ABC duo. They remained focused laser-like on the importance of pre-game preparation and finding the right pieces to building a competitive basketball team.

Unfortunately, from this point on not even the most experienced journalist could remain immune from the constant distractions wrought by ABC’s technical breakdown. White’s discussion of Westbrook’s transfer from Tennessee to Connecticut was momentarily sidetracked when Dorka Juhasz’s crisp footwork drew an offensive foul on Mercer guard Endia Banks. Ward, in contrast, remained resolute. Ducharme’s sneaky steal, drive and underhanded lay-up may have impressed fans at the game. But it was no match for Ward’s pointed analysis of Mercer’s program-building over previous seasons. Unfortunately, another Ducharme steal and score, followed by a Christyn Williams steal and layup on an inbounds pass, precipitated further trouble. White and Ward fought to maintain focus as ABC apparently could not figure out how to cut the live-feed. At one point, Ward actually discussed UConn’s teamwork, pausing to note yet another offensive foul induced by the Huskies’ suffocating defense.

Alas, the technical breakdown could not be endured. Mid-way through the 90-minute special, the White-Ward conversation reached a complete standstill. Puzzled audiences were met by two minutes and fifteen seconds of total silence coupled with end-to-end third quarter action. From this point on, the live-feed increasingly undermined all efforts at a productive conversation. A Paige Buecker’s steal-and-score, a Ducharme 3-pointer from the corner, and a Ducharme-to-Williams fastbreak ruined a bracing account of Mercer guard Erin Houpt (including whether this “true freshman” really is 5’6”). In fairness to ABC, a subsequent shot to the mouth of Nika Muhl did suggest a connection: Houpt and Muhl are both guards; each are under 6’; and both possess a one-syllable last name.

In the end, Ward’s talent in salvaging a potential disaster cannot be overstated. As the matter approached closure, she nimbly snatched defeat from the jaws of victory—querying whether UConn forward Aaliyah Edwards’ purple and gold braids just might be an hommage to the Minnesota Vikings. And yet, perhaps the live-feed did not pose as much a threat to conceptual continuity as might have appeared. After all, Mercer did not score a point during the third quarter. So how much of a distraction could the game have been? In this sense, ABC technicians may not bear full responsibility for this confusing hybrid of arm-chair reflection and real-time tournament competition. In any case, we can be reasonably confident the good people at ABC will work out the bugs in the near future. A prime-time April 3 “Up-Close and Personal” 90-minute special on UConn head coach Geno Auriemma is rumored to be in the works.
By far the best post I have ever read on the Boneyard! Thank you Connie!
 

MSGRET

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Happy to oblige. Lamentably, my last attempt at satire ("Paige Bueckers: Most Over-Rated Player Ever; Cheater") proved a bit too incendiary; after preliminary exhibition and not inconsiderable positive reviews, it was expunged from the record.
I remember that piece and couldn't understand why people hated it so much, they had to know it was satire. I thought it was a good write up.
 
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Aside from the fact that there are just not enough quality announcers to handle all the games that are televised these days, the producers probably remind them that it’s not radio and the viewers can see what is happening so, don’t try and keep up with the game. Just talk about whatever.

The problem is that it’s a fast moving game. We can’t see everything. Many substitutions come at time outs when we are watching commercials. But, hardly anyone reports them to us when the game resumes.

All announcers should be required to watch tapes of Doc Emrick. The best play by play announcer that ever was. In games like hockey and basketball, there should be no difference between radio and TV when it comes to calling a game.
 
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Emrick also had one of the best analysts ever as his partner (Bill Clement).
 
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Enjoyed as usual
Only suggestion is to please don’t put (satire) in the title.
Sometime in the past I read one of these masterpieces by you without the warning
Halfway through the reading I can still remember thinking what the hell is going on here? It finally got through to me at the end and I could imagine hearing you saying “ Gotcha! ” That was half the fun
(But keep in mind that years ago someone recommended me to watch the movie This is Spinal Tap. I was completely clueless and half way through the film I asked Vida Don’t these poor guys realize that they are being made fun of? I feel sorry for them.);););););););););););)(N=11)
 
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Only suggestion is to please don’t put (satire) in the title.
Good idea. Unfortunately, my previous effort was dinged by the Admins. because it was taken the wrong way by some readers. The decision was made to include "satire" parenthetically--a sort of prophylactic, I suppose, for the ideologically-impaired. I agree that telescoping the gag kinda kills the fun. But I don't know what else to do about it.
 
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Happy to oblige. Lamentably, my last attempt at satire ("Paige Bueckers: Most Over-Rated Player Ever; Cheater") proved a bit too incendiary; after preliminary exhibition and not inconsiderable positive reviews, it was expunged from the record.
Connie, I always enjoy reading your articles. Keep up the good job.
 
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March 21 (Connie DisUPI) -- In a truly disconcerting display of sports synergy gone wrong, an ABC studio discussion of women’s college basketball suffered repeated interruption by Saturday’s first-round NCAA tournament action pitting the Connecticut Huskies against the Mercer Bears. Commentators Stephanie White and Pam Ward were the unfortunate victims of an obvious snafu at a corporate level. For nearly 90 minutes, the two struggled to keep the matter on point as their insights clashed with an erroneous live-feed of a game being played in Storrs, Connecticut.

Matters did not have an auspicious beginning. White and Ward exchanged opening salvos on injuries and their significance to basketball competitiveness. In contrast, audiences were shown UConn’s tenacious defense leading to a shot-clock violation on Mercer’s second possession. This seemed to momentarily unnerve White and Ward as the two abandoned their discussion, and instead spent the next five minutes actually commenting on Mercer’s scrappy defense and UConn’s back court pressure. To their credit, the two got matters back on track, returning the conversation to basketball injuries. UConn substituted in Big East defensive player of the year Nika Muhl. However, the White-Ward team remained on point as they discussed the effects of COVID and Azzi Fudd’s early season foot injury. Even the subsequent substitutions of the Huskies’ Evina Westbrook and Caroline Ducharme could not unnerve the ABC duo. They remained focused laser-like on the importance of pre-game preparation and finding the right pieces to building a competitive basketball team.

Unfortunately, from this point on not even the most experienced journalist could remain immune from the constant distractions wrought by ABC’s technical breakdown. White’s discussion of Westbrook’s transfer from Tennessee to Connecticut was momentarily sidetracked when Dorka Juhasz’s crisp footwork drew an offensive foul on Mercer guard Endia Banks. Ward, in contrast, remained resolute. Ducharme’s sneaky steal, drive and underhanded lay-up may have impressed fans at the game. But it was no match for Ward’s pointed analysis of Mercer’s program-building over previous seasons. Unfortunately, another Ducharme steal and score, followed by a Christyn Williams steal and layup on an inbounds pass, precipitated further trouble. White and Ward fought to maintain focus as ABC apparently could not figure out how to cut the live-feed. At one point, Ward actually discussed UConn’s teamwork, pausing to note yet another offensive foul induced by the Huskies’ suffocating defense.

Alas, the technical breakdown could not be endured. Mid-way through the 90-minute special, the White-Ward conversation reached a complete standstill. Puzzled audiences were met by two minutes and fifteen seconds of total silence coupled with end-to-end third quarter action. From this point on, the live-feed increasingly undermined all efforts at a productive conversation. A Paige Buecker’s steal-and-score, a Ducharme 3-pointer from the corner, and a Ducharme-to-Williams fastbreak ruined a bracing account of Mercer guard Erin Houpt (including whether this “true freshman” really is 5’6”). In fairness to ABC, a subsequent shot to the mouth of Nika Muhl did suggest a connection: Houpt and Muhl are both guards; each are under 6’; and both possess a one-syllable last name.

In the end, Ward’s talent in salvaging a potential disaster cannot be overstated. As the matter approached closure, she nimbly snatched defeat from the jaws of victory—querying whether UConn forward Aaliyah Edwards’ purple and gold braids just might be an hommage to the Minnesota Vikings. And yet, perhaps the live-feed did not pose as much a threat to conceptual continuity as might have appeared. After all, Mercer did not score a point during the third quarter. So how much of a distraction could the game have been? In this sense, ABC technicians may not bear full responsibility for this confusing hybrid of arm-chair reflection and real-time tournament competition. In any case, we can be reasonably confident the good people at ABC will work out the bugs in the near future. A prime-time April 3 “Up-Close and Personal” 90-minute special on UConn head coach Geno Auriemma is rumored to be in the works.
Careful, Connie. One of these days I might just give you a run for your (satirical) money. In the mean time, you win the trophy: a handsome bust of Pam Ward sculpted out of chopped liver.
 

Plebe

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Happy to oblige. Lamentably, my last attempt at satire ("Paige Bueckers: Most Over-Rated Player Ever; Cheater") proved a bit too incendiary; after preliminary exhibition and not inconsiderable positive reviews, it was expunged from the record.
I adored that piece, and just the other day reminisced with a fellow Boneyarder about it. Universality of approval is not the measuring stick of genius. :)
 
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I try never to listen to the women's game announcers on TV. Just tie into the streaming broadcast prior to the game and avoid all the frustration and anger. Hard to beat Bob Joyce on the radiocast.
 
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Not just women's basketball but all sports broadcasting in general there is too much yakking about everything other than the game. I find the mute button on my remote very handy to eliminate the noise.
 

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