Tipping and Restaurant Etiquette Thread | The Boneyard

Tipping and Restaurant Etiquette Thread

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Seems like a hot topic. Here’s my question.

How often do you go out with 1-2 other couples or with 3-4 buddies and cover the entire tab? From the other thread it seems like pretty much no one does.

My friends all take turns picking it all up assuming it shakes out in the end.
 
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When going out with good pals, a lot of times it is split evenly (80% of the time), sometimes I will cover the whole thing (10%), sometimes one of my buddies will cover the whole thing (10%). Like you, assuming it will all shake out even, or come close to even in the end, though unspoken. Dates, kind of the same (only counting the dates where you get past those first few dates... split a lot of the time (60%), I cover quite a number of times too (35%), sometimes she offers to cover (5%)). Long term relationships and relationships of more than a few months + my marriage, I cover mostly (90% of the time).

*obviously percents seen in this post are rough estimates
 
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8893

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Seems like a hot topic. Here’s my question.

How often do you go out with 1-2 other couples or with 3-4 buddies and cover the entire tab? From the other thread it seems like pretty much no one does.

My friends all take turns picking it all up assuming it shakes out in the end.
I do it all the time with my friends, but it's usually lunch.

I pay for other couples when I invite them to join us for any type of celebratory meal like birthdays.
 
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I always pick up the tab and then get Venmo’d. More credit card points for me. Is Venmo just a millennial thing?
 
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whaler11

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Seems like a hot topic. Here’s my question.

How often do you go out with 1-2 other couples or with 3-4 buddies and cover the entire tab? From the other thread it seems like pretty much no one does.

My friends all take turns picking it all up assuming it shakes out in the end.

this is the first post of yours that has made sense in a month.

who doesnt pick up checks and hang out with people that pick up checks.

pay it forward folks
 

jleves

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My wife and I cover the tab almost all the time when we take her parents out unless it's one of our birthdays then we let them pay (which is kind of weird because although we are 'comfortable' her father is worth a bunch more than us - I think we do it just to make him know we're doing fine).

When we go out with friends, which isn't really very often, it's almost always split 50/50 with no regard to who had what. The exception again would be birthdays when 100% is covered by whoever's birthday it isn't.

I go out to lunch a lot with people from work and then we split it based on what everyone had. Our rule is you add up what you had and multiply by 1.3 to cover tip and tax. Works out great.
 
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If 2 couples (4 people), we will split it and each group pays. We will break it down to specifics if it's clear one party ordered much more than others or upon other couple request. Otherwise we split it evenly, especially if we share food (often go for small plates/tapas).

If more than 4 people, we will usually have 1 person cover it (dibs gets the points), then send out requests for the split on an app (Square cash over Venmo in my group).

Essentially, whatever is easiest for the serving staff.
 

whaler11

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does no one just draw cards? everyone tosses one in and one gets pulled randomly?

i guess since the average age here seems to be 75 it makes sense it’s like how people pay at friendlys
 
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does no one just draw cards? everyone tosses one in and one gets pulled randomly?

i guess since the average age here seems to be 75 it makes sense it’s like how people pay at friendlys

We don't normally do credit card roulette, but I know people who do.
 
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I always pick up the tab and then get Venmo’d. More credit card points for me. Is Venmo just a millennial thing?
Happens to me when I don’t want it to.

For example, over Labor Day weekend my wife and I stayed over at a friend’s house who’s a single parent. We ordered delivery, I put it on my card and then she venmo’d me the next day even though I wanted it to be our treat as a thanks for hosting. Then it becomes an awkward debate of either telling the person to cancel the venmo or taking the cash.
 
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I hate that we have to tip here; I love the European model at restaurants.

Still, since we live in the US: 20% unless the server really sucks.

Usually my friends and I split it evenly; when we're out grabbing drinks, we take turns picking up tabs. Anything else is barbarism.
 
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I hate that we have to tip here; I love the European model at restaurants.

Still, since we live in the US: 20% unless the server really sucks.

Usually my friends and I split it evenly; when we're out grabbing drinks, we take turns picking up tabs. Anything else is barbarism.
In Europe the servers get paid a living wage, though even there tipping is becoming more common. For me 10% outside the US if the service is good; 20% in the US unless the service is bad. Most wait staff make crap and I can afford it so the little bit of wealth transfer does them a lot more good than it hurts me.
 

Husky25

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does no one just draw cards? everyone tosses one in and one gets pulled randomly?

i guess since the average age here seems to be 75 it makes sense it’s like how people pay at friendlys
When we are with my wife's "normal" siblings, it sometimes turns into a contest on who can be the most creative in giving the wait staff their card.
 
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Out with the wife's family we always just split it, doesn't even warrant a discussion. With my siblings they all suddenly become accountants trying to figure out who owes how much. I always end up paying a little more than I owe just to keep my annoyance level down as opposed to haggling over a few dollars. Guess who we go out to dinner with more?

Tips are always 20% unless it's some truly horrific service (even then it's probably 15%, I can't recall ever not tipping). Exceptional service, which is much rarer than poor service, gets bumped up.

What do you guys tip on takeout?
 
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Out with the wife's family we always just split it, doesn't even warrant a discussion. With my siblings they all suddenly become accountants trying to figure out who owes how much. I always end up paying a little more than I owe just to keep my annoyance level down as opposed to haggling over a few dollars. Guess who we go out to dinner with more?

Tips are always 20% unless it's some truly horrific service (even then it's probably 15%, I can't recall ever not tipping). Exceptional service, which is much rarer than poor service, gets bumped up.

What do you guys tip on takeout?

On takeout? At least 50%.
 

whaler11

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I try to make sure I have a few singles to throw in the tip jar. Usually $1 to $3 for an average order, $5 if it’s something more involved.

look at this fancy pants. carries singles like a robber baron.
 
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I try to make sure I have a few singles to throw in the tip jar. Usually $1 to $3 for an average order, $5 if it’s something more involved.

What’s more involved?
 
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Out with the wife's family we always just split it, doesn't even warrant a discussion. With my siblings they all suddenly become accountants trying to figure out who owes how much. I always end up paying a little more than I owe just to keep my annoyance level down as opposed to haggling over a few dollars. Guess who we go out to dinner with more?

Tips are always 20% unless it's some truly horrific service (even then it's probably 15%, I can't recall ever not tipping). Exceptional service, which is much rarer than poor service, gets bumped up.

What do you guys tip on takeout?
If it's a large order with food and sodas I almost always just tip on the food and not the sodas...

Basically my rule of thumb is 15% If I like their voice on the phone and they take the time to give it all a cute presentation with the way they packaged the food, if I don't like the timbre of their voice or if the presentation of the order is lacking I spit on the counter and tip them nothing.
 
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My friends and I just tell the wait staff we're paying for our own when we start. I'm not paying for anybody else's food.

SO takes my card to pay for us both like it's her job. And makes 3x as much as me. I'm not bitter
 
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I feel like in the old days, when people paid mainly with cash, the waitstaff made out a lot better with groups. The bill would come and people would throw cash into the middle of the table. There was not anyone calculating. Everyone would make sure to toss in more than enough to cover their portion and tip. Somehow there ended up being more than enough cash to cover the meal and a real generous tip. I think now, with everyone paying with cards, people are a lot more percise.
 
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Happens to me when I don’t want it to.

For example, over Labor Day weekend my wife and I stayed over at a friend’s house who’s a single parent. We ordered delivery, I put it on my card and then she venmo’d me the next day even though I wanted it to be our treat as a thanks for hosting. Then it becomes an awkward debate of either telling the person to cancel the venmo or taking the cash.
Situations like that can be awkward. I’d like to think that
Happens to me when I don’t want it to.

For example, over Labor Day weekend my wife and I stayed over at a friend’s house who’s a single parent. We ordered delivery, I put it on my card and then she venmo’d me the next day even though I wanted it to be our treat as a thanks for hosting. Then it becomes an awkward debate of either telling the person to cancel the venmo or taking the cash.
Why not just leave the cash somewhere the individual could find it after you leave to avoid any awkward debates?
 

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